10 definition by aquarius32

A fabulous county in Pennsylvania. One of the richest, and part of the Delaware Valley, less commonly known as the Philadelphia metro area. Montgomery, likes its nearby sister Bucks, is both rural and suburban with many similar characteristics. Its biggest claim to fame is that it is the only county in the state of PA with the greatest amount of retail. Yeah it beats out Pittsburgh, big time. Have you ever heard of King of Prussia? It is the largest mall in the country based on actual retail space. The Mall of America is only larger since it has an amusement park. And the Philadelphia Premium Outlets are just up the road. Suburban Square, the oldest outdoor shopping center in the country is found in Ardmore, along the ritzy Main Line. But shopping isn't the only notable thing about Montgomery. It has acres of open space, and the vast Green Lane Reservoir Park up north in the Upper Perkiomen Valley. Not to mention the fact that Montco (its abbreviation by locals) is one of the fastest growing counties in PA. Plus its got heavily-rooted German heritage, as noted in the towns of Schwenksville, Lederach and Souderton. The only drawbacks might be the oppressive congestion on Rt. 422 and extensive suburban sprawl. But who cares! Montgomery County has it all!

A store run by Gap, Inc., which postures itself as the "upscale" line by being more expensive than both Gap and Old Navy. After you rummage through a few pile of shirts and scour the whole store for anything colorful, one realizes that it is no better than the Gap and with the quality just as lacking. Banana Republic tirelessly competes with J. Crew, its primary rival, although the corporate execs forget that a store filled with beige, brown, and khaki only invites a similar trend of mediocrity. Why bother?

The third-largest metropolitan in the state of Pennsylvania, as it is known by non-Lehigh Valley residents. It consists of the cities of Allentown, Bethlehem, and Easton located in Lehigh and Northampton counties. Scrape off the gloss and it is in fact a TIME WARP. It is a place where conservative, WASPY middle-aged residents inhabit as well as younger parents with children go to raise families and clog the roads with their horrendous driving skills. The area has gained attention in recent years, as evidenced by a new casino in Bethlehem and the Promenade Shops at Saucon Valley. Yet in spite of these progressive improvements, people here are stuck in the 1950's and firmly resist change. Perhaps thats due to the fact that there are so many old people as well as gun-loving, pickup-driving hicks who think that the Gap is upscale shopping. The speed limits are set far to low as way of accommodating the slow drivers who can't merge to save their lives. Travel guides and tourism agencies boast its "proximity" to Philadelphia and New York City however there is no meaningful connection to either of those places whatsoever. The Lehigh Valley disguises itself as a peaceful middle ground between the more expensive metropolitan areas found to its south and east, when really it is just like any other decaying, Rust Belt place in Pennsylvania. People who choose to live here think that the "Valley" is the best place on earth. Don't buy into it. Move somewhere else.