4 definitions by Zarathud

First sexual intercourse after ending it with your significant other. Done primarily to reaffirm that you are still in the game and a one-time pass to engage in guilt-free, no-strings-attached indulgence of your primal desires with someone who would otherwise be socially off-limits.
"My old gal-pal Bobbie came over and banged my brains out last night. Don't think she's looking for a relationship though. She just broke up with her boyfriend. so it was probably her Free Agent Fuck."
by Zarathud April 10, 2012
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The trouble with making the first pot of coffee in the morning before you've had that first cup of coffee to steady your nerves.
Dude, I spilled old coffee grounds all over the place due to morning clumsiness.
by Zarathud December 9, 2010
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A man who stares at a woman in a way that makes her feel uncomfortable or creeped out.

Said man believes himself to be Joey Tribbiani giving her "The Look," but somehow he never gets around to actually stepping up and asking her, "How you doin'?"

Such a stare is not entirely vacant, but it is completely devoid of self-awareness and it gives good men everywhere a bad name just for looking.
"Dude, if you wanna' check out chicks, you can feast your eyes, but don't be a fucking starehole about it. Either talk to her or move the fuck on with your life.”
by Zarathud May 23, 2014
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Automatically "liking" every comment on your Facebook status.
I was really excited that John liked my comment on his FB status until I looked at the other comments and realized it was a Straight Like-back.
by Zarathud October 14, 2011
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