Definitions by Thefanman

shopping with your dick 

Using testosterone rather than your brain by buying the biggest baddest item just for bragging rights rather than usefulness, such as buying a 6 burner grill when you’re only cooking for yourself or buying a chainsaw with a 48 inch bar just for cutting the occasional small tree.

Guy 1: why are you shopping with your dick? You would never use that.
Guy 2: I just want it for shits and giggles.
Guy 1: Your money pal, not mine.

shopping with your dick by Thefanman July 6, 2022

german whip syndrome 

German whip syndrome is a disorder that causes a driver to experience a sense of self entitlement, a sense of superiority, and demonstrates extreme road rage towards anybody who blocks their way and the sufferer will do whatever it takes to get in front and cut off said person even if it means putting others at great risk. Many don’t indicate direction aka failing to use turn signals.
People at high risk usually drive BMWs, Mercedes-Benz, Audis, Volkswagens, and Porsches.

Guy 1: OH SHIT!! fucking asshole pulled out in front of me and almost made me crash.

Guy 2: sounds like that guy has German whip syndrome.

Guy 1: yup, looks like he’s driving a BMW M series so of course he thinks he owns the road.

german whip syndrome by Thefanman June 5, 2018

Waldo 

1. Character from a children's book

2. Prison slang for guards are coming.

Ok here's 1 gram of weed. "WALDO!!"
OH SHIT!! I've gotta hide this weed!!

Waldo by Thefanman February 13, 2017

make whoopee

An old persons term for sex. Typically used by 60 year olds.

Back in my day ur grandma and I would make whoopee in the back of a pickup truck at the drive in theatre.

make whoopee by Thefanman August 19, 2016

Dialing the rotary phone 

Female clitoral masturbation involving the fingers.

That girl has been in there for awhile, maybe she's dialing the rotary phone.

(Knock knock), I'm dialing the rotary phone honey.

Dialing the rotary phone by Thefanman July 25, 2016

polish the hook

Another term for jacking off.

I need to go to the bathroom and "polish the hook" if you know what I mean;)

polish the hook by Thefanman July 23, 2016

Lock picking

The act of using a lock pick typically made out of a windshield wiper to open a door, often illegally such as in a break in

Lock picking is the preferred method of entry by criminals and is like a key to the city.

Lock picking by Thefanman May 23, 2016