Definitions by The airplane mechanic
grangaholic
grangaholic
grang-uh-hawl-ik | noun
A person hopelessly addicted to visiting Granger’s at the Clock Tower, usually for a perfectly cooked ribeye, followed by an out-of-this-world fall martini…or three.
Common symptoms include:
Craving steak for no apparent reason, treating the fall cocktail menu like a personal challenge, and telling everyone, “We’re just stopping in for one drink.”
There is no known cure—but another martini usually helps.
grang-uh-hawl-ik | noun
A person hopelessly addicted to visiting Granger’s at the Clock Tower, usually for a perfectly cooked ribeye, followed by an out-of-this-world fall martini…or three.
Common symptoms include:
Craving steak for no apparent reason, treating the fall cocktail menu like a personal challenge, and telling everyone, “We’re just stopping in for one drink.”
There is no known cure—but another martini usually helps.
You might be a grangaholic if the bartender knows your martini order and the ribeye starts cooking before you even sit down.
grangaholic by The airplane mechanic September 11, 2026
Dirt Bag Airman
An Airman who possesses a highly developed ability to disappear the exact moment work begins for a cigarette break, reappear when food arrives, and somehow have an appointment every time they are needed. Often recognized by a questionable uniform, selective hearing, an energy drink, and repeated use of the phrase, “Nobody told me.” A true DBA operates at the absolute minimum level required to avoid paperwork while maintaining maximum distance from the NCOIC.
Jensen is such a Dirt Bag Airman, the only two things he’ll willingly do are marshal planes in and take smoke breaks—and somehow the smoke breaks last longer than brake jobs.
Dirt Bag Airman by The airplane mechanic August 13, 2026
Belles' Suitors
The dudes who thought they were answering a lonely hearts ad from Belle Gunness, an Indiana woman who had a killer dating strategy. These guys showed up expecting love and left in a much, much worse situation: buried six feet under at Belle's farm. Spoiler alert: her idea of "companionship" was a little more final than most people would prefer.
Your Mom’s dating life is like the modern-day version of Belles' Suitors—she’s not burying anyone, but with her dating body count, she might as well start a support group for all the guys left emotionally buried. At least her version of Belles' Suitors doesn’t involve a shovel
Belles' Suitors by The airplane mechanic January 15, 2025
Belles' Suitors
The poor saps who thought they were answering a lonely hearts ad from Belle Gunness, an Indiana woman who had a killer dating strategy. These guys showed up expecting love and left in a much, much worse situation: buried six feet under at Belle's farm. Spoiler alert: her idea of "companionship" was a little more final than most people would prefer. Also, "swiped left" didn’t even cover it.
Your Mom’s dating life is like the modern-day version of Belles' Suitors—she’s not burying anyone, but with her dating body count, she might as well start a support group for all the guys left emotionally buried. At least her version of Belles' Suitors doesn’t involve a shovel!
Belles' Suitors by The airplane mechanic January 15, 2025