Telephony's definitions

one-banger

A one-banger is simply slang for a single-engine airplane like a Cessna 182 or a Piper Cub.

{Julio} Hey Jesus, there's a single-engine airplane taking off from the airport over there.
{Jesus} Julio, you mean to say that there's a one-banger headed this way?

by Telephony August 20, 2019

wash

What many people call laundry; e.g. dirty clothes.

Boy am I pooped. I did five loads of wash today.

by Telephony August 15, 2019

popcycle

Popcycle (pronounced, "/ˈpɑpsɪk(ə)l/")
A surprisingly common misspelling of the word, "Popcicle®", an ice pop on a flat wooden stick manufactured by the Unilever Group of Companies.
Normally only seen in written, typed, or printed material because popcycle is pronounced the same as Popsicle®.

{from an SMS message}: Honey, please swing by the store on your way home and get me a popcycle or two

by Telephony July 31, 2019

spanken

How some people misspell the word, "spanking".

I don't know about you but I'd rather be giving the dog a spanken than having to scrub this nasty-ass toilet with a toothbrush because I thew away the orange juice that mom put in my lunchpail!

by Telephony July 24, 2019

ass doilies

Plain and simple: those flushable paper toilet seat covers!

Hey Marge! Can you get an old T-shirt out of the van please? They're out of ass doilies in here!

by Telephony July 22, 2019

Sonic Z

The opposite of Sonic X -- that is, Sonic the Hedgehog that moves extremely slowly.

{The Sonic X theme song but with torpedoed lyrics}

♪ Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop ♪
♪ Gotta stop slow, gotta stop slow, ♪
♪ Gotta stop slower, slower, slower, slower, slower ♪
♪ Movin' at speed of dark (make tracks) ♪
♪ Slowest hedgehog it barks ♪
♪ Got ourselves a situation, stuck in a new location, ♪
♪ Without any explanation, no double relaxation! ♪
♪ Don't, don't, don't, don't, don't think, don't stink, ♪
♪ Just stop, stop, stop, stop, s-s-s-s-stop, stop! ♪
♪ Gotta avoid the ♪
♪ Bam Slam Gadget! ♪
♪ Sonic, he's not the hero! ♪
♪ Sonic, he's number zero! ♪
♪ Sonic, he's coming whee!, ♪
♪ So watch out... For Sonic Z! ♪
♪ Gotta stop slow (Sonic!), gotta stop slow (Sonic!), ♪
♪ Gotta stop slower, slower, slower, slower, slower! ♪
♪ Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop! ♪
♪ So... (Sonic) nic... (Sonic) Z, ♪
♪ Gotta stop slow! ♪
♪ Gotta stop slow! ♪
♪ Gotta stop slower, slower, slower, slower, ♪
♪ Sonic Z! ♪ :-)

by Telephony July 8, 2019

THE FV¢K?

An abbreviated form of what the fuck? with some letters of the word fuck replaced in order to circumvent the onboard censors found in many online BBS programs (forums or even fora if you really want to be an ass about it).

{CFrom a YouTube description of a drone flight that has Slayer music overlaid upon it}

THE FV¢K?
Slayer is neither *SWEET* nor *RELAXING!!!* ;-)
It's like box jellyfish venom to the ears of many!!! :-O

by Telephony July 1, 2019