Simian Pachyderm's definitions

Hypnorthosis

A trancelike state, artificially induced, in which a person has a heightened suggestibility regarding the need for foot orthotics.

After visiting a soothsayer in a shopping mall kiosk, that guy won't even go scuba diving without his orthotics. Practitioners of hypnorthosis sometimes take it too far.

by Simian Pachyderm July 27, 2009

Raisin Dieter

Raisin Dieter

Sara Palin's pronunciation of "raison d'etre".

For some folks in the liberal media, making fun of me seems to be their raisin dieter.

by Simian Pachyderm December 21, 2009

Newmeatmarket

Gentlemanly moniker for the town of Newmarket, Ontario.

"The boys from Ireland are arriving tonite. I'd like to line up some birds for them that won't waste their time if you know what I mean. Any thoughts?"

"Sure mate, get a white panel carpeted van and do a run to Newmeatmarket. You'll be sorted in no time."

by Simian Pachyderm January 27, 2010

cunnilingua franca

The act of communicating with a female who speaks a foreign language by using your mouth, lips, and tongue to stimulate her genitals.

"Mr. O'Donaghue, how did you persuade Mme. Ambassador to agree to the terms of the Treaty if she only speaks Swahili and French and no one at the Irish Embassy was available to translate?"

"My cunnilingua franca is not too bad I tell you. Not too bad at all."

by Simian Pachyderm October 27, 2010

Psychiatryst

It's what you call it when a psychiatrist has an affair with an adult patient in their care.

Any shrink who gets caught banging their patient shouldn't have their license taken away for having a psychiatryst. They should be struck for being such a poor diagnostician.

by Simian Pachyderm July 25, 2009

Psychexotic

A person who is considered to be both exotic and psychotic. Outside of Thailand it's typically a female.

"That Sudanese girl is quite exotic and more than a bit psychotic."

"Dude man, it's just crazy dealing with psychexotic chicks. It can get pretty messy."

by Simian Pachyderm January 29, 2010

Boston Crabs

A parasitic pubic lice indigenous to the greater Boston area.

"After picking up that clinical research associate at the Red Sox game, I woke up with some fierce itching down there I tell you. What do you think the story is, fire ants?"

"Mate, sounds to me more like a case of Boston crabs".

by Simian Pachyderm January 18, 2010