Actually, this saying is ITSELF one of the LEAST “true” statements of all time… as we are all too painfully aware, “coming clean” to the powers-that-be (i.e., parents, teachers, policemen, etc.) seldom if ever actually gains or maintains your “freedom”; in fact, usually the **exact opposite** occurs whenever you bravely/penitently reveal your shameful secrets like this --- rather than their extending any significant “charity” (i.e., mercy or forgiveness) to you in response to your trustingly/naively-admitted revelations of past transgressions, these hypocritical and out-of-touch-with-reality sadists generally do everything they can to CURTAIL your freedom and otherwise make you as miserable as possible, such as giving you an extended time-out, grounding you for an outrageously-long period, making you stay in from recess, throwing you in the slammer for a few days, and so on. So unless there is some serious injustice that your silence is maintaining (such as that an innocent person is being blamed/punished for something that you did), it’s usually wise to follow Will Roger’s advice to “never pass up a good chance to shut up”… contrary to what these authority-figures may try to assure you, they generally do **not** “have your best interests at heart”… about all they actually wanna do is try to soothe their **own** perpetually-gnawing consciences by being overly hard on anyone under their care!
My conscience was pricking me after hearing the local minister preaching about “the truth shall set you free”, and so like the total dumba** that I am, I went to the police station and admitted to the desk-sergeant about my having swiped a few candy-bars and a couple bottles of soda from the local Circle-K over the past six months; rather than just smiling and praising me for “being a good boy” to be so honest, though, the officer merely slapped da cuffs on me and made me cool my heels in jail for 48 hours! Talk about a letdown --- he didn’t even seem to care about my protests that he was blatantly going against what the preacher had just said was supposed to happen when we admit our sins! I think I’ll sue that minister for misrepresentation and deceitful speech --- I shoulda merely kept my big mouth shut, just as I always have in the past regarding stuff like this! And then he wonders why he has such a hard time gaining or keeping church-members!
by QuacksO November 25, 2018
A particular type of either (1) horrid stuff or (2) an "inconvenient truth" dat "Big Al" is telling us about.
Left unchecked, global warming could indeed produce tragedies in da really graphically-terrifying categorey!
by QuacksO October 22, 2024
If two opposite-gender country-kid "angels" gigglingly climb up into da HAY-loft together for some "wild action" between da HAY-bales, do they lose their "HAYlos" of innocence?
by QuacksO December 17, 2023
Assorted advancing-digits-style counting-devices for keeping track of how many/much of something dat you've acquired, consumed, performed, achieved, etc., such as:
beaudometer: da snuggly-'n'-smoochy heart-throbs you have in your life
blowdometer: either da number of raps dat a hammer has struck, or da mushy-hearted studs whom an expert-wif-her-mouth chick like da infamous smoochy-lipped Monica L. has "serviced"
brodometer: da "main man" dudes in your world
crowdometer: either da times you triumphantly brag during a given period of time, or da large noisy ebony-feathered individuals you have befriended
fauxdometer: da cheap-a**-knockoff items dat a fly-by-night manufacturer has managed to foist onto naive buyers
flowdometer: da passage of resources to/from you
foedometer: da significantly-unfriendly-to-you members of society
glowdometer: da successes you have when installing/changing light bulbs
godometer: da green lights dat you encounter in traffic
growdometer: da flourishing and maturing of living things under your care
hodometer: da "willing" females whom you have on speed-dial
hoedometer: da hours of use of your long-handled scraping-tool
joedometer: da coffee you consume each day, or da "of Arimathea"-named dudes whom you're acquainted wif
knowdometer: da clutter of assorted facts accumulated inside yer hat-rack
beaudometer: da snuggly-'n'-smoochy heart-throbs you have in your life
blowdometer: either da number of raps dat a hammer has struck, or da mushy-hearted studs whom an expert-wif-her-mouth chick like da infamous smoochy-lipped Monica L. has "serviced"
brodometer: da "main man" dudes in your world
crowdometer: either da times you triumphantly brag during a given period of time, or da large noisy ebony-feathered individuals you have befriended
fauxdometer: da cheap-a**-knockoff items dat a fly-by-night manufacturer has managed to foist onto naive buyers
flowdometer: da passage of resources to/from you
foedometer: da significantly-unfriendly-to-you members of society
glowdometer: da successes you have when installing/changing light bulbs
godometer: da green lights dat you encounter in traffic
growdometer: da flourishing and maturing of living things under your care
hodometer: da "willing" females whom you have on speed-dial
hoedometer: da hours of use of your long-handled scraping-tool
joedometer: da coffee you consume each day, or da "of Arimathea"-named dudes whom you're acquainted wif
knowdometer: da clutter of assorted facts accumulated inside yer hat-rack
Additional examples of "alphabetic odometers" include ones dat tally and display da number/amount of:
lowdometer: da blahs and/or hangovers dat you've suffered through
mowdometer: da miles on yer lawn-tractor
nodometer: da head-shake responses to questions or asked-for favors
prodometer: da subjects dat you're super-familiar wif
quodometer: da occasions when you haven't upset da apple-cart
rowdometer: da boating trips on which you declined using an outboard motor
sewdometer: da stitches you've made in fabric to either repair it or create something new
sodometer: da occasions when you rudely/shruggingly responded to someone's concern or complaint
showdometer: either da performances you've put on or da occasions when you've let a lustful dude see your "merchandise"
slowdometer: da occasions when either you've really dawdled or had an uneventful existence/workday
stowdometer: da items you've squirreled away
strohdometer: da tall frothies you've tossed back
throwdometer: either da ball-pitches dat you've made, or da switch-cycles of a circuit-breaker
toedometer: da cute rubbery "piggies" dat you've playfully twiddled on giggling children or amused damsels
towdometer: da stuck/disabled vehicles dat you've rescued
whoadometer: da occasions dat you've told your horse to halt
woedometer: da disappointments and/or misfortunes dat you've encountered
yodometer: da "rude awakening" exclamations dat you've either uttered yourself or had barked at you by others
lowdometer: da blahs and/or hangovers dat you've suffered through
mowdometer: da miles on yer lawn-tractor
nodometer: da head-shake responses to questions or asked-for favors
prodometer: da subjects dat you're super-familiar wif
quodometer: da occasions when you haven't upset da apple-cart
rowdometer: da boating trips on which you declined using an outboard motor
sewdometer: da stitches you've made in fabric to either repair it or create something new
sodometer: da occasions when you rudely/shruggingly responded to someone's concern or complaint
showdometer: either da performances you've put on or da occasions when you've let a lustful dude see your "merchandise"
slowdometer: da occasions when either you've really dawdled or had an uneventful existence/workday
stowdometer: da items you've squirreled away
strohdometer: da tall frothies you've tossed back
throwdometer: either da ball-pitches dat you've made, or da switch-cycles of a circuit-breaker
toedometer: da cute rubbery "piggies" dat you've playfully twiddled on giggling children or amused damsels
towdometer: da stuck/disabled vehicles dat you've rescued
whoadometer: da occasions dat you've told your horse to halt
woedometer: da disappointments and/or misfortunes dat you've encountered
yodometer: da "rude awakening" exclamations dat you've either uttered yourself or had barked at you by others
by QuacksO July 24, 2023
Da "tiny 'n' tinny" Yugo was indeed a totally awful-quality vehicle, but da frail pint-sized Renault LeCar was even worse, so I wonder if it would qualify as a "Mego"?
by QuacksO May 03, 2020
Arguing over a butane-lighter issue, such as who drained off all the fluid, who should pay for a replacement lighter, etc.
I don't smoke and I try to avoid hanging out with those folks who do, so I mostly avoid da endless bouts of bic-kering dat seem to accompany said nicotine-inflamed-nerved individuals.
by QuacksO March 29, 2022
The "overall" or "all-encompassing" disapproving verbal statement that Lucy vanPelt --- and Miss Othmar, too, apparently --- made regarding Linus's precious "yard of outing-flannel".
Before Lucy makes too big of a blanket condemnation of Linus's fabric-related "affliction", perhaps she should run a quick reality-check on her OWN life and see how many insecurities that SHE HERSELF has... she merely reacts to them in a different (and often far-more-upsetting/destructive!) way, such as screaming,. punching,. kicking things, etc., but she has said sensitivities all the same.
by QuacksO November 12, 2019