5 definitions by Nested Elevator

Spaff Gamble

Deciding on whether or not to indulge in the act of masturbation in the knowledge of limited time before the return of an obstructing party. i.e a girlfriend who has gone to the shops for 10 minutes.

I feel like some relief, but Jane's only gone out for 10 minutes. Should I or shouldn't I? This is a bit of a spaff gamble.

by Nested Elevator November 8, 2017

Cark It

To die / pass away / expire. Usually used only for humans but will probably find its way to being used for animals and batteries.

Can simply be shortened to "Cark"

"You'll never believe this, he could just cark it!"

by Nested Elevator September 14, 2007

locking on

When a man passes his point-of-no return during sexual intercourse, and knows he's going to come.

"Slow down, John, you're going to come"
"Too late, Jane, I'm locking on"

by Nested Elevator November 19, 2016

clunge dump

A woman's period

You getting any Jeff?
Not this week, Ann 's having a clunge dump

by Nested Elevator May 24, 2017

Wank Shuffle

Imagining an object of desire during masturbation and then deciding to switch focus on a different source of inspiration. E.g An ex-girlfriend gets replaced in imagery for the office hottie. Beware to not allow an image of a grotty rotter in while locking on

I can't dedicate this one to one woman, I'll put a few on wank shuffle

by Nested Elevator January 6, 2018