Mr. Cardboard's definitions
1) Taking mind altering substances right before a wordy exam that requires you to express an opinion - such as philosophy or english literature, enhancing your ability to plumb the depths of the mind and/or lowering your inhibitions enough to say what you really think, whilst either enhancing or diminishing your ability to actually write it down.
2) Letting your mate be the first to sample the latest batch of drugs you have acquired, by pretending that you have all already taken some and the effects are really good, whereas in fact you suspect you have just been sold half a kilo of caustic soda.
3) A test performed by people in authority who are too scared to take drugs, in order to see if any of their employees are actually any fun outside of work.
2) Letting your mate be the first to sample the latest batch of drugs you have acquired, by pretending that you have all already taken some and the effects are really good, whereas in fact you suspect you have just been sold half a kilo of caustic soda.
3) A test performed by people in authority who are too scared to take drugs, in order to see if any of their employees are actually any fun outside of work.
1) I can't believe I got an A in religious studies, I scored some bud an hour before the exam and had a sly toke to keep me calm but it just made me so much more able to refute things eloquently.
2) Dave! Long time no see, fancy a line? This is great stuff man I've been on it for weeks.
3) "All employees will have a drug test on Monday"
"Um, I'm the regional manager, have never had a bad review, got promoted twice last year and brought in 6 new accounts this month already. And I take drugs. My team are the most useless bunch of monkeys who ever came down from the trees and none of them take drugs. What exactly is the point of this test?"
"All employees will have a drug test on Monday"
2) Dave! Long time no see, fancy a line? This is great stuff man I've been on it for weeks.
3) "All employees will have a drug test on Monday"
"Um, I'm the regional manager, have never had a bad review, got promoted twice last year and brought in 6 new accounts this month already. And I take drugs. My team are the most useless bunch of monkeys who ever came down from the trees and none of them take drugs. What exactly is the point of this test?"
"All employees will have a drug test on Monday"
by Mr. Cardboard October 30, 2011
Get the drug testmug. 1. A low-level employee of McDonalds or any other generic fast-food outlet.
2. An extremely stupid person, more fucktarded than a regular fucktard.
3. A fucktard's offspring, as the prefix 'Mc' means 'son of' in Scottish.
2. An extremely stupid person, more fucktarded than a regular fucktard.
3. A fucktard's offspring, as the prefix 'Mc' means 'son of' in Scottish.
by Mr. Cardboard November 7, 2011
Get the McFucktardmug. A sizeable stash of pornography built up over several decades, enabling you to relive the experiences of people who masturbated in those times.
Will Ferrell: "I still hate you, but you've got a pretty awesome collection of nudie mags."
John C. Reilly: "Yeah, I got them from the '70's, '80's and '90's. It's like masturbating in a time machine."
John C. Reilly: "Yeah, I got them from the '70's, '80's and '90's. It's like masturbating in a time machine."
by Mr. Cardboard November 7, 2011
Get the time machinemug. A slogan used by British road safety campaigners to try to reduce the number of motorcycle deaths caused by people riding motorcycles into cars, rather than trying to get motorcycle riders to ride more responsibly.
"I used to ride a motorbike but I had a few close calls and decided it was too dangerous. Think bike? Think maybe I'll stop being a fucktard and get a car before I end up with my handlebars through my sternum."
by Mr. Cardboard November 7, 2011
Get the think bikemug. Sarah Silverman: "I was going to get an abortion the other day. I totally wanted an abortion. And it turns out I was just thirsty.”
by Mr. Cardboard November 6, 2011
Get the thirstymug. A sunny disposition adopted by fat women because if they didn't they would have nothing to offer society.
Dude: So what's your friend like?
Chick: Oh she's awesome, she's really bubbly.
Dude: You mean she's fat?
Chick: No, she just has a great outlook on life. Always so positive.
Dude: Okay then. But is she fat?
Chick: Well, she's kinda big...
Dude: Uh-huh, that's what I thought.
Chick: Oh she's awesome, she's really bubbly.
Dude: You mean she's fat?
Chick: No, she just has a great outlook on life. Always so positive.
Dude: Okay then. But is she fat?
Chick: Well, she's kinda big...
Dude: Uh-huh, that's what I thought.
by Mr. Cardboard November 6, 2011
Get the bubblymug. The logical response to being called a motherfucker. Being called "motherfucker" implies that you fuck your own mother and is generally considered the highest insult one can bestow.
By immediately responding "dadshagger" one temporarily confuses one's literary opponent as to whether it would be worse to shag their dad or fuck their mother and whether they have in fact been semantically bested. Erstwhile, thou positions thine foot squarely betwixt their thighs with such vehemence as to render them infertile for the rest of their sorry ass life.
By immediately responding "dadshagger" one temporarily confuses one's literary opponent as to whether it would be worse to shag their dad or fuck their mother and whether they have in fact been semantically bested. Erstwhile, thou positions thine foot squarely betwixt their thighs with such vehemence as to render them infertile for the rest of their sorry ass life.
by Mr. Cardboard November 6, 2011
Get the dad shaggermug.