Mr Cunninglinguist's definitions

shit in a piss time

Toilettiquette...When visiting the restroom out on a date, or at a dinner party, you take a lightning fast crap to fool your date or fellow diners into thinking you only needed a piss by being in the can for such a short time.

a very hurried poop taken so as not to keep guests waiting

I really needed to take a shit but my date had arrived, so I told her I was just 'nipping to the bathroom to freshen up' and took a quick 'shit in a piss time', so as not to keep her waiting

by mr Cunninglinguist October 26, 2012

Kings!

East Midlands slang term... to claim immunity from something, cross index and middle fingers of both hands and hold them up, and say "I've got Kings", it should be enough to get you off the hook or out of doing a chore

the opposite of "Dibs" or "Bags"

4 men at the bar in the Pub...
1st man: 'whos turn is it to get the beers in? I got the last ones in.'
2nd man: "Not me - I've got Kings!" (holding up crossed fingers)
3rd man: "Kings!" (also holding up crossed fingers)
1st man points to 4th man and says "...odd lines mate...they've got Kings... go get the beer!"

by Mr Cunninglinguist June 25, 2013

JESUS

A pretty cool chap according to his fans. Played in goal for Tottenham Hotspur FC in the late 60's.

Eddie Wolstenholme (commentator): "JESUS SAVES.. but Best knocks in the rebound!!

by mr Cunninglinguist April 1, 2013