Mr Cunninglinguist's definitions

Popeyeing of the forearm

a condition usually found in single men who spend so much time 'pleasing themselves in the Boy area' that their right arm over develops severely, like one of Popeye's arms...or a fiddler Crab

man: Doc, you got to help me, I can't get my shirt sleeve over my arm its so swollen.
Doc: I'm afraid young man that you have developed "Popeyeing of the forearm"
man:is it curable?
Doc: try not to wank your nutsack flat every night and shag someone instead, that'll sort it.

by Mr Cunninglinguist August 20, 2013

two slices of fuck all

1. a sarcastic reply to someone who is not satisfied with what they have or
2. a claim to have eaten less than someone else
3. a moan that there was no food ready to eat at home

man 1 'I've only got one slice of bread here mate'
man 2 'you'll get two slices of fuck all in a minute mate if you don't stop moaning'

man 3 'I only had a pot noodle for my dinner'
man 4 'so what, I've had two slices of fuck all for mine'

man 5 'what did you get for your dinner when you got home mate?'
man 6 'same as usual, two slices of fuck all'

by Mr Cunninglinguist May 15, 2010

ENAMEL BANGER

a huge turd, so long it touches the toilet bowl before being 'crimped off' by the ass muscles- also known as a 'crowd pleaser' , a yam, U571 or a Trent Otter

I did a massive shit last night, a real Enamel Banger

by Mr Cunninglinguist May 15, 2010

Guitarsole

a guitar player with an enormous ego, or is very annoying/rude/petulant the word is a portmanteau of the words 'Guitar' and 'Arsehole'
not legally permitted to name anyone in particular but most 'guitar gods' are Guitarsoles at some point in their careers, I imagine.

After the gratuitous 22 minute solo in which several Stratocasters were burned, knocked over and smashed, he raised his arms in mocking triumph to the crowd - of 9. what a wanker, He's such a Guitarsole its unreal, its only the pub down the road, not the Hammy Odeon!

by Mr Cunninglinguist October 5, 2012

F1 Finish

the Money shot at the end of a Porn sequence where 3 guys 'arrive' at the same time all over one (or more) chicks (or guy) by emptying their cocks- in a similar way to the Podium finish of a Grand Prix race

".... and so at the end of the '75 Swedish Grand Prix all that remains is for Emerson, Mario and James to get hold of the Jereboams and drench the adoring fans and each other with champagne for a proper F1 Finish"

by mr cunninglinguist October 21, 2012

Sack Off

Mild substitue for the stronger 'fuck off', used by kids in the 1970's Derbyshire playgrounds if in earshot of 'the dinnerlady'.
similar in use to the Aussie 'Rack Off'

The word 'sack' replaces 'fuck' in other uses:
Sack All - nothing
Sackin' Ada - 'kin'ell.. an exclamation of surprise
Sack it off - to get rid of or finish (also Sack it)

Sacked Off - fed up with or bored with or pissed off with

eg1:
kid 1 "who's brock me pencil, was it you?"
Kid 2 "Sack Off, I ant ad it"

eg 2:
Kid 1 'Gizza Chip mate?'
Kid 2 'An you can Sack off an all Get yer own chips'

Alternative 'clean' Lyrics to 'Its so Easy' by Guns 'n' Roses

"I see you standin' there, you think you're so cool
Why don't you just...
Sack Off!"

by Mr Cunninglinguist October 5, 2012

Donkey Dropper

A very High Ball, bowled in Cricket
The bowler sends a ball down the crease but lets the ball loose at the top of his swing, resulting in a very high 'full toss' type ball, coming down on the Batsman's head, often a No Ball.
Defined so as it comes out of the sky so fast that if it hit a donkey on the head it would knock it out.

the opposite of a 'P-Roller' which goes along the ground towards the batsman's feet.

'England require four runs to take the game in the ninth over before tea here at Edgbaston. Lilley makes his run up and... Oh No he's sent it high, its a real Donkey Dropper, Brearley has his hands over his head, its coming down fast...with snow on it'

by Mr Cunninglinguist October 5, 2012