Definitions by Michael Schmidt
fire dog
Formerly known as the IQ crew from Circuit City. Fire Dog is a sad reincarnation of a computer repair service that failed miserably. Now, instead of just messing up your computer, they now have the ability to destroy your home theater equipment as well. If this isn't enough, they will dress in an amazingly strange combination of neon green and black. The name Fire Dog is not going to help this company either.
Check in:
Customer - "I need my computer fixed."
Fire Dog - "We can set up your home theater."
Customer - "I don't need a home theater, just a working computer."
Fire Dog - "Okay."
Check out:
Customer - "Where are all my files?"
Fire Dog - "We fixed your computer, didn't we?"
Customer - "I asked you to fix it, not restore it.
Fire Dog - "Who do you think we are, Geek Squad?"
Customer - "I need my computer fixed."
Fire Dog - "We can set up your home theater."
Customer - "I don't need a home theater, just a working computer."
Fire Dog - "Okay."
Check out:
Customer - "Where are all my files?"
Fire Dog - "We fixed your computer, didn't we?"
Customer - "I asked you to fix it, not restore it.
Fire Dog - "Who do you think we are, Geek Squad?"
fire dog by Michael Schmidt November 11, 2008
Fire Dog
Formerly known as the IQ crew from Circuit City. Fire Dog is a sad reincarnation of a computer repair service that failed miserably. Now, instead of just messing up your computer, they now have the ability to destroy your home theater equipment as well. If this isn't enough, they will dress in an amazingly strange combination of neon green and black. The name Fire Dog is not going to help this company either.
Check in:
Customer - "I need my computer fixed."
Fire Dog - "We can set up your home theater."
Customer - "I don't need a home theater, just a working computer."
Fire Dog - "Okay."
Check out:
Customer - "Where are all my files?"
Fire Dog - "We fixed your computer, didn't we?"
Customer - "I asked you to fix it, not restore it.
Fire Dog - "Should I care?"
Customer - "I need my computer fixed."
Fire Dog - "We can set up your home theater."
Customer - "I don't need a home theater, just a working computer."
Fire Dog - "Okay."
Check out:
Customer - "Where are all my files?"
Fire Dog - "We fixed your computer, didn't we?"
Customer - "I asked you to fix it, not restore it.
Fire Dog - "Should I care?"
Fire Dog by Michael Schmidt November 10, 2008
UBS
Commonly mistaken for USB, Universal Serial Bus, by an extremely large portion of the US population. This is a connection protocol for computers. USB can be used to connect printers, cameras, and a vast number of other things to other devices (normally a computer).
One must be very careful as to not offend a person while correcting them. Directly pointing out the error could result in the person spontaneously combusting in your face.
One must be very careful as to not offend a person while correcting them. Directly pointing out the error could result in the person spontaneously combusting in your face.
"I did not get a UBS cable with my printer."
"My UBS ports don't work"
"Where are the UBS drives?"
"The internets are broken, please use the UBS for internet access."
"My UBS ports don't work"
"Where are the UBS drives?"
"The internets are broken, please use the UBS for internet access."
UBS by Michael Schmidt May 5, 2006
Circuit City
1. A place for people who don't like Best Buy can shop.
2. A place where people who can't get a job at Best Buy work.
3. A place where Best Buy workers go after being fired.
2. A place where people who can't get a job at Best Buy work.
3. A place where Best Buy workers go after being fired.
"I'm going to shop at Circuit City from now on if you don't give me a computer!"
"I'm telling my whole family to shop at Circuit City from now on because you wouldn't send someone to my house to show me how to use my DVD player!"
"Why doesn't Best Buy honor Circuit City's warranty?"
******
-Circuit Customer: "Where's my laptop?"
-Circuit Employee: "I set it on the counter"
-Circuit Customer: "It's not there."
-Circuit Employee: "I swear I set it there."
-Circuit Customer: "Are you telling me you let someone steal my laptop?"
-Circuit Employee: "Maybe..."
"I'm telling my whole family to shop at Circuit City from now on because you wouldn't send someone to my house to show me how to use my DVD player!"
"Why doesn't Best Buy honor Circuit City's warranty?"
******
-Circuit Customer: "Where's my laptop?"
-Circuit Employee: "I set it on the counter"
-Circuit Customer: "It's not there."
-Circuit Employee: "I swear I set it there."
-Circuit Customer: "Are you telling me you let someone steal my laptop?"
-Circuit Employee: "Maybe..."
Circuit City by Michael Schmidt May 2, 2006
Circle Jerk
1. (v) Several men standing in a circle masterbating.
-Urban legend says sometimes a piece of bread is placed in the middle. The last person to cum on the bread has to eat it.
2. (adj) A description of a ridiculous situation.
-Urban legend says sometimes a piece of bread is placed in the middle. The last person to cum on the bread has to eat it.
2. (adj) A description of a ridiculous situation.
"Do you guys actually work, or is it just a circle jerk back there?"
"This is one big fucking circle jerk!"
"This is one big fucking circle jerk!"
Circle Jerk by Michael Schmidt May 2, 2006
Fromit
Frozen vomit. Forms after an individual vomits and the vomit is allowed to freeze by natural or artificial means. Fromit is typically found in the Upper Midwest region after bar closing on sidewalks.
Fromit by Michael Schmidt May 1, 2006