Teletubbies

A TV show for children. But be forwarned because, title misleading, this show is NOT about fat people that can move objects with their minds. Instead of that fantastic idea for a show, the truth is that it's about four dome-dwelling anthropomorphic creatures that look like the unholy offspring of human, monkey, and felt. These horrendous characters bare the names of "Tinky-Winky", "Dipsy", "Laa-Laa", and "Po" (upon investigation, it has been found that Tinky-Winky is in fact homosexual. This was discovered by the fact that he carries a purse and has an upside-down triangle atop an antenna on his head). The show is about the immature adventures they have as a probable after-effect of the various psychedellic drugs they have, no doubt, ingested. They play in a grassy land where it is always spring, whilst narration is spoken in the background. The thing that freaks me out most is the sun. What's so freaky about a sun, you ask? Well for starters, the sun is nothing more than a yellow, projected baby's face. It's true. Need I say more? Probably, so I'll tell you this: if you ever feel the urge to watch this show, see a psychiatrist. If you're a child and you have an urge to watch Teletubbies, go ahead, it might be educational. On the other hand, it WAS created likely by speed addicts. Oh well.

Guy: "Hey, wanna watch Teletubbies?"
Guy2: "No way. That shit's for kids."
Guy: "Oh. Well lets get high and watch Speed Racer!"
Guy2: "Kay"
(Later that night the Teletubbies broke into their house and killed them, and no one cared because everyone knows Teletubbies is the ONLY show to watch while high!)

by Mbleh October 22, 2007