Definitions by Maggie T

Gay Salt

Sugar.

A latte with extra gay salt please. Then remove the pineapple from my rectum.

Gay Salt by Maggie T November 21, 2025

As much use as a business page in the Guardian

Something of no use to the chronically economically illiterates, who read the Guardian and worship Carl Marx.

“ That’s about as much use as a business page in the Guardian!” Exclaimed Rupert before spilling egg down his tie.

As much use as a business page in the Guardian by Maggie T November 21, 2025

Private Plane 

An expensive way to display your hypocrisy and stupidity.

She parked her private plane next to a snowdrift and started to harangue the plebs. It wasn’t hypocrisy because she had paid the bribe…

Private Plane by Maggie T May 21, 2025

Jimmy Savile Badge

UK “honour” long since discredited by the recipients

He wore his Jimmy Savile Badge with pride and tried to remember who was DPP when the Yorkshire fiddler was released from his call…

Jimmy Savile Badge by Maggie T May 21, 2025

Private Jet 

An elaborate and expensive way to appear a hypocrite.

Yeah, but I off set the carbon with lots of trees, and a Papal dispensation. Now let’s park my private jet next to that snowdrift while I harangue you about Global Warming you smelly peasants

Private Jet by Maggie T May 7, 2025

Plastic Boyfriend 

Either a Sextoy or a pretend boyfriend to make a middle aged Catlady look normal, but having the reverse effect.

As she sat next to her plastic boyfriend all night all the lady could think of were her cats, and her dildo.

Plastic Boyfriend by Maggie T May 7, 2025

Jimmy Savile Badge

A knighthood. A British honour so devalued by being given to worthless creatures like “Sir” Jimmy that it has a reverse effect.

As “Sir” Bob arose the price tag on his Jimmy Savile badge could be clearly seen…

Jimmy Savile Badge by Maggie T May 7, 2025