5 definition by Lanan

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The universal scapegoat for forces yet to be explained, originating back to when man thought the wind was Satan farting.
Uuhhhmmmm... God did it?
by Lanan May 14, 2005

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A movement founded by myself, promoting conservation of energy, in an effort to postpone entropy. Followers are looked upon not as leeches to society, but activists, bailing out the universe from imminent doom with a cry of reason, often drowned out by shrills of "duuurrrr" from every dronish, hard-working idiot in the world.
I'm no fuckin' Republican; I'm lazy.
by Lanan May 10, 2005

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The Universal answer to anything and everything.
"What is the meaning of life?"
"ur mom"

"What time is it?"
"ur mom"

"What's 2+2=?"
"ur dad... errm, I mean mom."
by Lanan September 24, 2005

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An overdose of sobriety characterized by, but not limited to, symptoms of thumb-twiddling, toe-tapping, Myspace bulletin posting, and sex with a camel; brought on by an extreme and dangerous case of interminable boredom; antonymic of alcohol poisoning, and in many instances, more serious. If not treated with medical attention immediately, risk of spontaneous combustion is increased, as the blood levels of lameness spike severely, causing organic malfunction. Symptoms may only be cleared through a highly concentrated, injected dosage of fun.
The Catholic Church alone is responsible for 10% of reality poisoning related deaths in the United States fnord.

Source: The Lanan times.
by Lanan May 20, 2006

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The term Straight Edge originates from Emoy little fucks who stay home at night and cut themselves (with a straight edge) while their friends are out partying hard. Straight edge "parties" commonly have such entertaining games as pin the tail on the donkey, and who can stay up the longest without succumbing to boredom induced exhaustion; a step up from being a Mormon, but still a mass of displaced losers in society, adhering to another pointless fad. Straight edges rarely go to non-straight edge parties, because they woe to know what they're missing out on.
"Only Good Charlotte and this straight edge understand my plight..."
by Lanan June 10, 2005

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