The guy in the hot tub that, like the Hot Tub Meerkat, can't quite commit to sitting all the way down but, damnit, they are trying, resulting in an act that resembles the Japanese Snow Monkey.
I was heading to the hot tub when i spotted the Hot Tub Snow Monkey and decided it was too fucking weird, I think i'll hit the sauna.
by John Wesley February 09, 2008
A dildo so large, one could find easier ways of inserting a hippo instead. Usually a gag gift, but you know if they make it somebody can sure the hell use it. As a derogatory remark, something (person, animal, thing, etc.) may be called a Dildopotamus in reference to the fact that besides looking like a dick, otherwise, they are useless.
I ordered some sex toys off the internet and they left this giant dildopotamus on my doorstep.
If you dont quit calling things a dildopotamus in front of the baby, shes going to wind up saying it.
If you dont quit calling things a dildopotamus in front of the baby, shes going to wind up saying it.
by John Wesley February 13, 2008
Ambulance driver. Usually characterized by their NREMT patch and window decal. Can also be spotted easily "off duty" (wal-mart, sonic, dollar general) wearing parts of their on-duty clothes and overtly apparent pager.
by John Wesley February 09, 2008
Someone who has had so much plastic surgery and/or botox, their lips no longer move and they must speak only using the motion provided by their lower jaw.
We saw this hot looking woman, but she had so much face surgery she looked like a muppet when she spoke.
by John Wesley February 09, 2008
Diet so severe and lacking in nutrition, the person on it either has the goal of looking like a crack whore or trying to get back down to their birth weight. Composed of "nibbling" instead of eating, even buffet plates of food look like appetizers. Food items such as tacos and burritos are comprised of a few small pieces of rinsed turkey meat and a single sliver of cheese (if they splurge). The avid dieter even orders small waters to go with their salads to avoid the calories ice contains.
Customer: "i'll have the 3 inch turkey club sandwich with the turkey meat dragged across the bread, a pickle with no juice and a small water."
Subway: "you must be on the crack ho skinny diet."
Dieter: "I like to put lemon juice on my baked potatoe as a butter substitute, tastes just like it"
Observer: "you dumb bitch, lemon makes anything taste like LEMON!"
Subway: "you must be on the crack ho skinny diet."
Dieter: "I like to put lemon juice on my baked potatoe as a butter substitute, tastes just like it"
Observer: "you dumb bitch, lemon makes anything taste like LEMON!"
by John Wesley February 12, 2008
Volunteer Firefighter. Characterized by their custom maltese cross back window sticker and general disregard for driving safety while using their "flashers". Can also be spotted easily "off duty" (wal-mart, sonic, dollar general) wearing parts of their on-duty clothes and overtly apparent pagers. Most have a wallet badge and emergency trauma bag in their back seat containing just enough shit to get them in a slightly worse situation than they already are.
I had a fender bender and 2 Vollies stopped and held c-spine on me. Needless to say, I didn't panic and "felt" like I would be OK, mostly because they told me I would.
by John Wesley February 09, 2008
The kind of joint somebody rolls when they are too cheap and stingy to roll a "fatty". So thin, the rolling paper makes up the bulk of said joint and resembles a mosquitos (skeeter) leg when finished.
by John Wesley February 09, 2008