Herr Doktor Grauwolf's definitions

obamanation

a state of beauty and grace; paradoxically, an antonym of the nearly identical sounding word, abomination

Wilhelm: "Let the obamanation begin!"
Vlad: "What! Your attitude surprises me!"
Wilhelm: "Typically,you misunderstand. What I said was, obamanation, not abomination. Big difference."
Vlad: "I smell neologistic revisionism!"

by Herr Doktor Grauwolf January 21, 2009

"Where's it at?"

a question to which the literal answer is, "between the 'is' and the 'at'." Sometimes, albeit rarely, the proper answer depends upon what the meaning of the word 'it' is. Considered obfuscating by some posing the defined expression.

Prosecutor: "Where's it at?" (meaning the missing 10 million dollars in question)
Indicted guy: "Between the 'is' and the 'at'."
Prosecutor: "Isn't that not an incomplete sentence and rather literal and evasive?"
Indicted guy: "Oh, you're good! Touché! Next question."

by Herr Doktor Grauwolf January 24, 2009

black velvet elvis

anything old and exceeding tacky, yet somehow still compelling and cool. Originally, a painting of "The King" done on black velvet using da-glo paint. Any preNAFTA kitsch sourced from Tijuana street vendors.

Dude: "Wow! That plaster pink flamingo is bitchin'! I want it!"
Bernie: "Yeah, that's a 'black velvet elvis' if I've ever seen one!"

by Herr Doktor Grauwolf January 24, 2009

armchair mercenary

an individual, typically male, who incessantly second guesses the outcome of military battles recreated on television. Often addicted to the History Channel, has never served in the armed services, but is an active member of the NRA, an avid gun collector, yet doesn't hunt. Can be somewhat oblivious to spousal interests or needs.

Armchair mercenary: "Bla, bla, bla, then you know honey, if Brigadier General Warren's scouts hadn't found Little Round Top undefended, then Colonel Vincent wouldn't have led his brigade up the hill and set up a picket line. If General Lee's troops had just arrived there, say, just 10 minutes earlier, 20 tops, the Battle of Gettysburg would have been a Confederate victory! The rest would be history! Hey, grab me another beer, would ya?"
Wife: "You are sooo smart, snookums! You're my favorite armchair mercenary! Get your own beer, but just one! Remember? I've got to go, uh..... go and visit my sick friend again."
Armchair mercenary: "Hey, what if the Rebel snipers had had Barrett 50s with match ammo? Where'd I put the remote?

by Herr Doktor Grauwolf January 25, 2009