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Herbie Dongsporran's definitions

Turbants

AKA Ragnits

The Indomitable community of insect like creatures that flourish in the chosen habitat of a Sikh's buttery scalp and head shroud.
Upon finally discarding his festering turb, Hardeep was overwhelmed, blinded and suffocated by the legions of scurrying turbants/ragnits that had dwelled on his bonce since youth.
by Herbie Dongsporran July 24, 2021
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Grooming Jam

The inaugral shedding of coose claret after a degenerate nonce has entered his victim for the first time.
When the police searched his bedroom, they found remnants of semen and grooming jam on his bespattered y-fronts and all 4 walls of the room.
by Herbie Dongsporran July 27, 2021
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Jizz Beard

AKA Splash Tash

The stocky mass of bugger broth which usually finds itself pumped on the chops of a genuflecting lass or ravenous mincer.
‘As Denise skipped out of Pinewood Studios after her successful audition, she wondered if the 50cc’s of rod flem that had been pissed on her face to form a claggy jizz beard was worth it.
by Herbie Dongsporran October 13, 2021
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Skid Ghost

Indelible stain of a baked or steamed in shit stain within a persons underpants, bed clothes, pyjamas

Common amongst patrons of bookmakers, gamers, anglers, coach drivers, truckers, the chronically bone idle/workshy and long haul pilots. AKA Skid Halo.
Tragically, an unsuspecting launderette owner leapt to his death after unzipping an anonymous holdall containing undergarments riddled with mighty skid ghosts. Police speculate the skull-splitting skid ghost vapours fueld his suicidal delirium.
by Herbie Dongsporran March 28, 2021
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Spackcess

(Disabled Access)

The extraneous appartus commonly designated to the burdensome handicapped.

Often ugly, obtrusive and surplus to requirements. Much like the spackcess.

These cumbersome, invasive mong mobilisers have infested public buildings such as library's, swimming baths, hospitals and schools.
'Predictably, the newly installed spackcess lift at the bingo hall has failed to decrease the volume of spack droppings that the caretaker must bleach and steam out of the carpets on a daily basis'.

OR

'Ironically, the access to the spackcess was compromised by a cloying lagoon of spack gravy. Creating a lethal skid pan for the able bodied bingo players'.
by Herbie Dongsporran October 12, 2021
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Sadiq's Supper

The digit dung lodged beneath the jagged, talons/fingernails of a goat violating Arab.

Sometimes consumed dry but frequently moistened by perspiration around the anus.

Consumed with a garnish of coarse black hair, this is a staple of middle-eastern cuisine.
Tired and famished, a slouching Saddiq chawed on his fingernails, reaping the bounty of an extended early morning ass gouging. A Sadiq's Supper.
by Herbie Dongsporran July 24, 2021
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Turdbulence

A rumbling, gurgling warning from within the stomach, indicating the imminent peril to the common vegan that they are about to be reduced to a human shit cannon.

A biblical shit blitz of nutty, pippy, seeded anus pulp from the redundant shit hole of said preaching eco-faggots.
'Violent turdbulence interrupted a lecturing Gabriel and Greta, forewarning the imminent weltering pints of shit being sent skyward from their burdened shitpipes.'
by Herbie Dongsporran February 13, 2023
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