Skip to main content

Grumpy Ned's definitions

I Can't Coman Kill Myself

It's a popular Nigerian expression for "In the end i did my best". It is often used by Nigerian men with lower sex drive than their partners (especially when the partner wants sex more often and in a more erotic way)

Although the term gained popularity through a song by Timaya named "I Can't Kill Myself" in 2019. As the popularity of the phrase has increased so too has the number of different meanings associated with it.
Bright: My wife complains i don't last longer in bed.
Bovi: How long does she expect you keep thrusting?
Bright: An hour or more. I told her i can't coman kill myself. It's sex not a damn trip to Benin.
by Grumpy Ned January 7, 2020
mugGet the I Can't Coman Kill Myselfmug.

Ibo

An English corruption of the word "Igbo" (used to describe an ethnic group of people living chiefly in South Eastern Nigeria). This is largely due to the English man's poor attempt at articulating the "gb" bilabial in Igbo.
I am an Igbo man, not Ibo.
by Grumpy Ned January 20, 2020
mugGet the Ibomug.

Monkey No Fine, But Him Mama Like Am

1. A popular Nigerian phrase (in Pidgin English) that implies that 'ugly' people cannot be loved by anybody other than their mothers, based on the belief that mothers generally love their kids regardless.

2. May have originated from the English saying, "a face only a mother could love"
Obasanjo is a typical example of monkey no fine, but him mama like am
by Grumpy Ned February 9, 2021
mugGet the Monkey No Fine, But Him Mama Like Ammug.

Have You Eaten?

This is a question typically asked by Nigerians to show care or pretend to worry about your 'stomach'. The question 'have you eaten?' is sometimes met with silence, heavy sigh, or a lie. And If the reply is 'I haven't eaten', there is a chance you will hear 'Go and cook na'.

The question could also suggest strong term of endearment.

The phrase is exactly what you get If someone likes you

It's also an annoying question we love to hear, even though we act like we don't

Three words that have lost their originally intended meaning

A serious inquiry that should not be taken seriously
Boy: Have you eaten?
Girl: Why are you asking?

Boy: I care about you.
by Grumpy Ned May 5, 2022
mugGet the Have You Eaten?mug.

Alobam

Of Igbo origin. A slangy expression used to describe someone with extreme loyalty, as well as one who supports and brings out the best in you. Originally popularized by Nigerian indigenous rapper, Phyno in 2014, and it's usage spread over the entire population.
Guy 1: Do you trust him?
Guy 2: Chibuzor is my alobam. So yes, i trust him
by Grumpy Ned January 9, 2020
mugGet the Alobammug.

I Can't Kill Myself

A term Nigerians often use to justify their tiredness or hesitance to do more than they have already done. A phrase that has become a handy excuse for lazy people.

The phrase however, is the first portion of the refrain in a famous song by Timaya with the same name. The song insidiously grows on you, crawls into your ears and lays musical eggs in your brain.
Amaka: Seyi, will you attend tomorrow's meeting?
Seyi: No, i won't. I can't kill myself.
by Grumpy Ned January 4, 2020
mugGet the I Can't Kill Myselfmug.

Share this definition