Definitions by Gordy Frigmahole

Briggsy Tramp-Squatting 

The disgusting practise of spreading peanut butter in one's own arse crack and then squatting naked over a prostrate homeless person. The tramp has not eaten for days and grabs what he sees as his best chance of a meal with both hands. The peanut butter is devoured by the hungry down-and-out as the squatter grins like a cretin, cheered on by his arty friends. The act was named after its originator Briggsy, the famous gay dwarf artist.

So how did you end up in hospital?

I was Briggsy tramp-squatting and sustained a rather nasty tramp bite. That's why I'm lying on my stomach. My gay arty arse is in agony.

Briggsy Tramp-Squatting by Gordy Frigmahole May 16, 2009

Briggsy's Brothel Bill 

A very large sum of money. The term is a reference to the armies of rent boys used by Briggsy, the world famous gay modern artist.

How much do you owe hairy Dennis?

Lord knows! About as much as Briggsy's brothel bill.

Briggsy's Brothel Bill by Gordy Frigmahole February 6, 2007

Briggsy Scale

A scale for determining a person's level of gayness. The scale runs from 1 (a straight person with an unintentional slight minciness in deportment) to 10 (Briggsy - the gayest of the gay).

See that guy with the pink lipstick and pink mini skirt?

The one with 8 guys wanking over him and a huge butt plug in his ass?

Yeah that one. He's number nine on the Briggsy scale.

Briggsy Scale by Gordy Frigmahole February 6, 2007

Briggsy Boots

Tatty and hideously stained leather boots worn by pretentious modern artists. The arty wearer hopes that the filthy footwear will give the impression that art is hard work. This is actually pointless as everyone knows that its just one step removed from flower arranging.

Briggsy Boots are only worn by the lowest type of gay arty scum.

Briggsy Boots by Gordy Frigmahole December 23, 2006

Briggsy Board

A type of ouija board used to communicate with grotesque dwarfs and gremlins.

Farmer Giles: I don't need a Briggsy Board to communicate with hideous midgets. I just need to phone DEFRA and ask for Mr Briggs.

Briggsy Board by Gordy Frigmahole December 23, 2006

Briggsy Poppins 

A gay stage musical starring arty dwarf Briggsy as a flying homosexual nanny. Most notable for the pornographic scene in which Briggsy penetrates the camp cockney chimney-sweep with his umbrella.

Briggsy Poppins? Worst musical since "Gay Jizzerables"

Briggsy Poppins by Gordy Frigmahole December 23, 2006

Briggsy World 

Theme park in Windsor celebrating the work of superstar gay artist Briggsy. The centrepiece is the Spunktank. This is a replica of Briggsy's most famous work of art, a drained swimming pool filled with Briggsy's jizz.

My favourite bit in Briggsy World is the Spunktank. I stole a pube as a souvenir.

Briggsy World by Gordy Frigmahole December 23, 2006