Definitions by EuroChemist

Tea 

Not the murky brown piss you British people are drinking, try some loose leaf asian tea for once in your life!

Kevin: What the hell are you drinking?
Idiot: 1 dollar bagged english breakfast tea.
Kevin vomits and proceeds to pour it down the drain

Tea by EuroChemist November 1, 2017

caffeine junkie 

Someone who is addicted to coffee/other caffeinated beverages. Most college students are caffeine junkies.

Kevin: Holy shit, how are you not late to class? You were sending me snaps at 5 am last night!
Student 2: Drank 5 cups of coffee.
Kevin: Caffeine junkie...

caffeine junkie by EuroChemist November 1, 2017

micro pig 

The cutest pet ever. They are also very smart and can feel emotions. Sadly they get sick very easily, so take good care of your new micro pig!

Also: microwaved pig meat.

Kevin: So do you have any pets?
Angela: Yeah, I have a micro pig.
Kevin: A what?
Angela: A micro pig, she is called Rose, and she is as cute as 100 puppies combined!

micro pig by EuroChemist November 1, 2017

Urban linguist 

Someone who writes definitions on urban dictionary all day long. You don't need a diploma to be an urban linguist.

Guy in a suit: So what was your previous occupation?
Kevin: I worked part time as an urban linguist.
Guy in a suit: You're hired!

Urban linguist by EuroChemist November 1, 2017

pee scale 

The scale by which the colour of pee is measured. From 0 to 10, 10 being pretty much orange. There is also a pulp scale measuring the amount of pulp in the pee. There are two ways of measuring pee, the toileted method, and the mid-stream method. The mid-stream method usually gives more accurate results, as different toilet designs can alter the perceived colour of the pee when using the toileted method.

Kevin: Shit man, that was like a 9 with a pulp factor of 7 on the pee scale!
Angela: You should visit the doctor.

pee scale by EuroChemist November 1, 2017

DMT Biosynthesis 

What the goal of every Chemist should be.

Kevin: What are you working on?
Chem student: DMT biosynthesis.

Kevin: Damn, you are gonna make a fortune!

DMT Biosynthesis by EuroChemist October 31, 2017

Stepping on legos 

A pain more brutal than the ninth circle of hell, like the sensation 10 000 stars exploding below your feet, while being stabbed with a million knives from all sides. Thankfully these effects are not long term.

I stepped on legos. After the unbearable pain went away I immediately wrote a definition on urban dictionary about stepping on legos.

Stepping on legos by EuroChemist October 31, 2017