A diet consisting of no meat or other proteins, and plenty of fruit, honey and other sweet foods, in order to make your sperm taste sweet. Knocks out a woman's main excuse not to swallow your load.
Tom: "Wanna go and get a couple of Big Macs?"
Dan: "No can do, i'm on a blowjob diet"
Man: "You gonna swallow tonight honey?"
Woman: "Eww, no, it tastes disgusting"
Man: "Today's your lucky day, i've been on a blowjob diet"
A crap that by the time you've turned to look at it has already disappeared down the U-bend
"Oh my God, did I just shit? That was a right proper stealth poo"
Penetrative Vaginal Intercourse. An acronym to describe the act of coitus in an online situation, in place of vague descriptions such as "BRB" or "AWK". Can be used to excuse oneself from conversation in order to have sex, or to explain what oneself has been doing during an absence
"Hey man, where you going?"
"What were you doing?"