A greasy lizard is an erect penis that has been smothered in lubrication before any kind of sexual activity (whether it is masturbation or sex with another person).
by Bill Beef February 16, 2025
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Get the Mac & Jack mug.A dumbrella is an crappy umbrella that does a shit job of keeping you dry. It easily gets blown in the wrong direction by wind.
My umbrella was working fine for a brief minute until a little gust of wind turned it into a dumbrella.
by Bill Beef February 16, 2025
Get the Dumbrella mug.Eye judo (aka Eye Jiu-jitsu) is a disciplined practice one needs to take in public places especially the workplace in order to avoid awkward or bad consequences. For instance if you see an attractive girl in the workplace and you look too much at her you may get fired for sexual harassment due to giving her “untoward looks”. Also Americans expect you to look them in the eye yet you got to be careful not to look too deeply – while talking to another guy you have to be able to look him in the eye but not so deeply or he will think you are attracted to him or want to have sex with him. Eye judo is a very subtle art and takes practice.
by Bill Beef August 16, 2025
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Get the Hobble bop mug.This is a self absorbed dumb ass heterosexual guy with a very low intelligence who walks around in public without a shirt on and wonders why other guys are looking him lustfully. He has no clue that not everyone in society is heterosexual and so he is baffled when other men look at him with lustful eyes. Also heterosexual guys and gay guys may have to divert their eyes when they see such a shirtless loser walking around. If a straight guy passes a self-absorbed shirtless guy he has to divert his eyes or else the shirtless dumbass might perceive him as "gay". If a gay guy walks by and perceives the shirtless loser, he might have to divert his eyes because the shirtless loser might not be someone he wants to sleep with.
Either way, whether you are straight, gay or bi no one wants to see a shirtless loser (AKA a shirtless American) walking around especially not in a foreign country where people have morals and basic decent standards.
by Bill Beef August 09, 2025
Get the Shirtless American mug.A toilet bowl talker is someone who likes to talk on their phone while sitting on the toilet. Toilet bowl talkers are not very bright and they're also slobs who don't give a shit. By far the majority of toilet bowl talkers are male. They are not that intelligent because if they are talking, while on the toilet, to a girlfriend, it doesn't occur to them that she may overhear his farting and she may be put off by it – but then again the toilet bowl talker wouldn't give a shit. Toilet bowl talkers are the sort of people who burp and fart around others because it makes them feel manly. It's a way of broadcasting that they don't give a shit but this is also an indication that they like smelling other people's farts, because since they fart around others, then they are unknowingly inviting others to fart around them. This is another sign of their low intelligence. Another peculiar tendency about toilet talkers is that when they are in a public restroom that has several stalls they will pick the stall that is right next to an occupied one instead of spacing out their distance and shitting next to an empty stall. This is because they like to smell farts and the odor of another guy's turds. Toilet bowl talkers wear shit stained underwear because they don't do a good job of wiping their ass (most of them don't wipe at all) and they're the kind of people who don't wash their hands after going to the bathroom and they'd never consider using poo-pourri because that would be too unmanly.
When I am in my bathroom in my apartment I can hear a toilet bowl talker from the floor directly above me. Because of the bathroom's echo I can hear every word the toilet bowl talker has to say in his “private” conversation.
by Bill Beef June 25, 2025
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