Bill Beef's definitions

Toilet bowl talker

A toilet bowl talker is someone who likes to talk on their phone while sitting on the toilet. Toilet bowl talkers are not very bright and they're also slobs who don't give a shit. By far the majority of toilet bowl talkers are male. They are not that intelligent because if they are talking, while on the toilet, to a girlfriend, it doesn't occur to them that she may overhear his farting and she may be put off by it – but then again the toilet bowl talker wouldn't give a shit. Toilet bowl talkers are the sort of people who burp and fart around others because it makes them feel manly. It's a way of broadcasting that they don't give a shit but this is also an indication that they like smelling other people's farts, because since they fart around others, then they are unknowingly inviting others to fart around them. This is another sign of their low intelligence. Another peculiar tendency about toilet talkers is that when they are in a public restroom that has several stalls they will pick the stall that is right next to an occupied one instead of spacing out their distance and shitting next to an empty stall. This is because they like to smell farts and the odor of another guy's turds. Toilet bowl talkers wear shit stained underwear because they don't do a good job of wiping their ass (most of them don't wipe at all) and they're the kind of people who don't wash their hands after going to the bathroom and they'd never consider using poo-pourri because that would be too unmanly.

When I am in my bathroom in my apartment I can hear a toilet bowl talker from the floor directly above me. Because of the bathroom's echo I can hear every word the toilet bowl talker has to say in his “private” conversation.

by Bill Beef June 25, 2025

Fart bag

Fart bags are men who like to fart around other people. Farting and being a slob makes them feel manly. Other peculiar traits about fart bags: the majority of them are blue collar workers as you never find them in an office setting. They usually talk in a course sounding voice like they have a sore throat and they often talk about negative stuff. They have little to no morals. They often brag about things such as theft, time behind bars and getting into fights. They curse more than necessary. Every other word out of their mouth is “fuck”. Fart bags have a ripple effect on the environment and cause everyone around them to be in a bad mood. They brag about how much pussy they get but in reality they get little to none. If they get laid once a year they'll inflate that number and brag how they get laid all the time simply because they go to titty bars and look at porn a lot. They need Viagra to get it up. They bash anyone who isn't 100% straight. Also they like to make fun of anyone who they perceive as “weird” since fart bags are mundane dullards. Fart bags have a low intelligence and don't read any books. Fart bags wear shit stained underwear as they don't know how wipe their ass. Fart bags enjoy smelling other people's farts, since they're always farting around others, they're inviting others to fart around them.

Going to work is depressing with fart bags around.

by Bill Beef July 1, 2025

Homophobe

A homophobe is a dirt slob who likes to eat at Hooters, goes to titty bars every weekend and has posters of nude women all over their walls. They're constantly talking about pussy and bragging about how much pussy they get but in actuality they get little to none. They hate LGBT people because they're jealous that LGBT folk actually have an amazing sex life, while the homophobe is a limp dicked buffoon who needs Viagra to get it up. The homophobe is obsessed with being manly and considers it manly to be a slob. They have dirt on their hands because they don't wash often, they like farting around people, they wear shit stained underwear, they don't wipe their ass, they have a gruff appearance and look like they haven't shaved in a few days. They talk with a course voice like they have a sore throat. Their favorite apparel is flannel shirts and clothes with a hunting camouflage pattern. They consider it manly to go hunting and kill dear that can't defend themselves. Their favorite drink up until 2023 was Bud Light when they immediately switched to Coors. They want to make sure everyone around them is straight and they will often ask other guys questions such as “so, you got a girlfriend?” or “wanna go to a titty bar?” to try to determine if all guys around them are straight.

Homophobes would be out murdering LGBT people if law enforcement did not exist.

by Bill Beef July 3, 2025

Wank n' spank

is just another fancy schmancy word for masturbation. That's all. Pretty simple.

For linguists who are working on a masters degree or higher that want to dive deeper into this word, it can also be spelled “wank & spank”, “wankenspank” or “wank and spank”

When I'm horny it is tempting to go wank n' spank.

by Bill Beef July 3, 2025

Holiday girlfriend

is a girl you meet abroad and then when you go back to your home country you talk to her through email and social media. If you like her a lot you may book another flight to go back and see her.

While abroad I met a holiday girlfriend and now I'm thinking about saving money to go back and visit her in a few months.

by Bill Beef July 3, 2025

Rent boy

this is a guy who is in his 20s who you may meet in a bar and think you can go home with him for free and then surprise, surprise! You find out you have to pay money to have sex with him! And not only that you have to pay money to his pimp as well, in order for him to get permission to leave the bar!

While on vacation I took a rent boy back to my hotel and paid him money to suck on my banana. (And boy, did he do a real fine job at it!)

by Bill Beef July 3, 2025

Dirt slob

A dirt slob is a shit slob who doesn't wipe his ass and wears shit stained underwear.

It sucks to live near a dirt slob.

by Bill Beef July 4, 2025