Retail slang: When you are at work (especially at a cashier position) and you get fucked (your asshole widened) by customer after customer, with no end in sight. This usually happens all at once because every customer needs to leave at the same fucking time I guess. It is not uncommon for dipshit customers to heckle you because they don’t have the intellect to understand that it being busy is not your fault.
Usually caused by short staffing or a bunch of uptight boomers coming in after church on Sunday morning.
Me: Tomorrow is Superbowl Sunday, or as its also known as: My annual asshole widening.
2.
Me: I’m going to go to the bathroom real quick. We have been getting our assholes widened for 3 hours straight and I am about to piss my pants Amazon style.
When some resigns or retires from a job, they are on "eternity leave". This can also refer to someone who has passed away, especially someone who worked somewhere for a long time, retired/resigned, then passed away later.
Oh I'm sorry, you didn't know that Kelly is on eternity leave? She resigned and moved to Hawaii!
With regrets I would like to inform you that my boss is officially on eternity leave. I will never see or hear them again. Ever.
The hypothetical man (often a sinistercharacter who decided not to go to boot camp) that is doing your girlfriend/wife while you are on deployment overseas.
Ain't no use in goin home,
Jody's got your girl and gone.
Ain't no use in goin back,
Jody's got your Cadillac,
Ain't no use in feeling blue,
Jody's took your checkbook too.