The first in a series of four books that are written horribly, are extremley repetitive in terms of adjectives and contains vampires that sparkle in the sun. About 45% of the pages in all 4 books combined are spent describing Edward Cullens 'cold, hard skin' and his "smoldering eyes". oh, and how his 'cold hard skin' *sparkles* in the sunlight. Did i mention its also extremley repetitive?

The main character is Bella Swan who is a stupid whore who depends totally on her trophy boyfriend to protect her from other vampires who want to do everyone a favour and kill her. (which is a shame they dont because shes so annoying)
Random Person: I read the first chapter of Twilight and lost approximatley 20% of my brain cells. The effects were especially noticable in todays math class
by SOME RETARD March 23, 2009
A plot used by the book companies to assassinate the new president.
Phase 1: The book companies hire a author to write a book that will give fat chicks hope that a vampire will stumble upon them and fall in love with them. It makes since seeing as how, with a few exceptions, fat chicks are reading the books.
Phase 2: They make a movie, the fat chicks go to the movie and spend an assload on snacks.
Phase 3:The movie theaters send the snack money back to the Book companies who then hire a gunman.
Phase 4: Dead president...while its still unclear as to why there doing this it is a threat we must all face.
Fat Chick: I'm going to buy twilight.
Guy: Are you trying to get our president shot?
by Alix McQ November 29, 2008
Brainwashing at it's finest.

Worst book in existence, not worth your time.

Girl #2: No he's not. He's just a word.
Normal person: Dude, turn off the capslock.
by Zeriyan January 26, 2009
I would probably find it difficult to go on without this book. Not because I'm in love with Mr. Topaz Eyes Sparklepants either. I personally think he has to be the flattest, dullest character ever written in as wish fulfillment for a lonely and delusional woman who apparently never got over her teenage emo phase. Twilight helps me go on, simply, because on some days, fantasizing about brutally killing every diehard Twilight fan that ever lived is my only reason for living. Just kidding. But I will bitch-slap one of them someday. Seriously. Watch me.
OTF (Obsessive Twilight Fan): OMG I can't believe how amazing Eclipse was! Oh but poor Bella who will she choose? I hope she chooses Jake! Because then Edward will be ALL MINE! OMG I love vampires!
Me: *slaps

Seriously. You all are pathetic. If there were such a thing as real vampires, I would love for you to run into one, just so you could see how pitifully wrong your sparkly gorgeous misconceptions are.
by Umyeahjuststopthatnow December 20, 2008
A series of books about a prepubescent teenager's rock hard abs.

"Twilight is for women and homosexuals."
by Not Good February 12, 2009
Twilight is a young/adult vampire romance novel by Stephenie Meyer and a movie directed by Catherine Hardwicke
A twilight is also a emo biatch.

All bitches are going crazy over the twilight books and movie and shit.
But twilight is such a bunch of whiny emo biatches, what ever happen to badasses vampires? now all they do is complain about their feelings. And what about vampires don’t fry in sunlight anymore! So instead of frying in direct sunlight, they sparkles unnaturally like small sad diamonds, shit! Thank goth that robert is a pretty shining disco bowl or else i had left the cinema on a drop of a hat. Yea i haven't read the books, but fuck those damn books! Stop readig that shit. Use your own fucking mind and make up a better story. I fuck the teenage romance between a 100-year old pathetic vampire ass and a 17-year old frikkin emo kid.
ESTER: "You are a emothic twilight "
MARIA: "shait!"
by †reptilicus† February 18, 2009
"My Life Is Twilight" is a site where over obsessed people come to be normal. But truth is, you are not normal. And who would make out with their dog anyways?
"My Life Is Twilight is the most stupid site ever. I'd rather visit My Life Is Average because I like Harry Potter wayyyyy better."
by lubylol April 10, 2010

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