| 24. | microsoft | ||||
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an evilcompany that became successful by thievery, bullshitting customers, keeping quality control OFF the table, and pulling unfair marketing schemes to leach money from people across the globe. continues to thrive off the rest of the population minus Mac users and uses its corporate power to control its market. Still has hardly made an effort to improve Windows since they know they have control over the market. They release new windows just to increase profit, and these "upgrades" are in effect just like looking through a different window at the same damn thing-a junk-piled OS. the xbox 360 is their only tangible product. this device is possibly the worst excuse for a video game system. the only reason people buy it is for the selection of video games and exclusive games like halo that microsoft bought out. *new xbox 360 4gb commercial*
Billy: "Wow that actually sounds like something i might buy from microsoft. they finally decided to really improve the 360. built in wifi, slimmer and runs quieter, sounds like a worthy game system." Jesus: Now billy, you may think that at the moment, but you must discern that this is Satan tempting you. If you buy the reasonably priced 4g version, you will be trapped into buying a $130 hardrive if you want to play co-op in Halo Reach. This is deceiful trickery, because they knew they could have made their 4gb system work with Halo Reach, but decided not to. This microsoft you speak of is only out for profit, so do not let them lay their selfish tricks on you." |
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| 1. | microsoft | ||||
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Organisation bent on world domination masquerading as a software company.
See also Bill Gates; Windows Fucking shit Microsoft programs
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| 2. | microsoft | ||||
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See World Domination
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| 3. | Microsoft | ||||
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A large terrorist organisation, hell bent on producing software that crashes and works slowly. Some of their more evil tactics over the years include waiting until just before you click the save button to make the screen go all blue for no reason, but more subtle tactics include waiting until you start to work, then annoying you with a sodding paper clip. Josh: "I'll just get on with some work..."
Microsoft Paperclip: "Hello!" Josh: *I'll just ignore him, and he'll go away*.... *starts to type* Microsoft Paperclip: "Do you want to write a letter?" Josh: "No." Microsoft Paperclip: "Okay, do you need some help with that?" Josh: "NO! NO! NO I DONT FUCKING WANT SOME HELP! PISS OFF!!" *clicks on hide, paperclip dissapears*...*begins to work...* ... 2 minutes pass ... Microsoft Paperclip: "Hello!" |
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| 4. | Microsoft | ||||
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An obvius copy of Macrohard, which Bill Gates stole the disk of while I was sleeping. He also copied my program Doors, and renamed it Windows. Me: *sleeping*
Bill Gates: I'll just take this disk... *yoink* Me: You, come back here right now, or I will personally come all the way over there and call Ronald F***ing McDonald to kick you in the nuts! Bill Gates: hehehe *escapes* I'll just change the name to Microsoft, and this program to Windows, and no one will ever know!!!! WAHAHAHA!!!! Me: Cheap B******! |
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| 5. | microsoft | ||||
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A company most famous for its satirical "operating system," Windows. A sort of play-on-code from genuine operating systems, Windows amuses millions with its cartoonishly-dated gui (graphical user interface), Gerald Ford-esque clumsiness (whoops! I froze again! *laugh track*), hyper-zealous licensing scheme, and utter lack of usability. For these reasons and many others Windows popularity remains very high. And why shouldn't spyware be able to install itself on my computer?!
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| 6. | microsoft | ||||
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The bane of civilization Damn all other systems to hell for not being able to overtake Windows as the dominant OS on the market.
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| 7. | Microsoft | ||||
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An inferior product that is out to rule the world. Microsoft's plans for building a death star device was shut down by officepax.
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