Top Definition
An extremely amazing penis which is not only long, but has girth and is pretty to look at.
"Dude, kyle has got a jesus penis!"
by kkbabi April 12, 2010

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When any male has a tattoo of Jesus inscribed upon their penis in any location.

Done so that during penetration, the man can say to the woman. "Can you feel that? You have Jesus inside you."
Woman: "Oh, Jim! That feels fantastic!"
Jim: "I knew getting a Jesus Penis was a great idea. Doesn't sex always feel better when you've got Jesus inside you?"
Woman: "DAMN RIGHT IT DOES!"
by RaptorJesus666 December 05, 2009

The Urban Dictionary Mug

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

Lotsa space for your liquids.

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

Your favorite word on a white mug.

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

One side has the word, one side has the definition. Microwave and dishwasher safe. Lotsa space for your liquids.

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Soft and offensive. Just like you.

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Smooth, soft, slim fit American Apparel shirt. Custom printed. 100% fine jersey cotton, except for heather grey (90% cotton).

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a phrase yelled not spoken when taken by surprise or pissed off.
Player1: (frags opponent on COD4)"YEAAAHH"
Player2: "JESUS PENIS"
by Ollie from the Mist March 30, 2008

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

Lotsa space for your liquids.

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

Your favorite word on a white mug.

Create a mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

One side has the word, one side has the definition. Microwave and dishwasher safe. Lotsa space for your liquids.

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Soft and offensive. Just like you.

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Smooth, soft, slim fit American Apparel shirt. Custom printed. 100% fine jersey cotton, except for heather grey (90% cotton).

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A term often yelled when either in a great debate, and or a pissed off mood.
Dawson: "Jesus Penis! These scrotum licking daddybag bitches keep reaming my rim in Halo!"

Shawn: "Wait what the fuck is jesus penis?"

Dawson: "Oh, you know!" (winks at Shawn)

Shawn: "Love you hubby."

Dawson: "Love you too hubster."
by Dawsy Boi September 21, 2011

The Urban Dictionary Mug

Lotsa space for your liquids.

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

Lotsa space for your liquids.

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

Your favorite word on a white mug.

Create a mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

One side has the word, one side has the definition. Microwave and dishwasher safe. Lotsa space for your liquids.

Buy the mug

The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Soft and offensive. Just like you.

Buy the t-shirt

The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Smooth, soft, slim fit American Apparel shirt. Custom printed. 100% fine jersey cotton, except for heather grey (90% cotton).

Buy the t-shirt