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football bat

used to describe a situation or something that has happened that is completely wrong or fucked up.
When Jason used pumice soap to jack off, Jill walked in and exclaimed, "That's about as fucked up as a football bat you bad mamma jamma!"
football bat by Jason March 10, 2005

Football bat

When something is totally supery-dupery gay, you can say that it's "as queer as a football bat." Because you don't use a bat in football. See also, tennis helmet.
I'm thinking of switching to FaceBook 'cuz MicePace is getting gayer than a football bat.
Football bat by panicBoy January 2, 2008

football bat

Noun. A slang term for a queer or gay male. Used in a similar manner as three dollar bill.
Did you see how Bruce was dancing? That guy is as queer as a football bat.
football bat by suomi September 19, 2005

Football Bat

A clever, hypothetical weapon used to attack an enemy that's making BS comments using football analogies. See "James Carville Goes Off on Fareed Zakaria" on Youtube.
"Ya he talked about an offensive linebacker.. when I read that I wanted to hit him with a football bat." - James Carville
Football Bat by Dave:P December 7, 2011

football bat

something really big, covers alot of space.
That bitch was hit with a football bat.
football bat by Tawny November 17, 2004

football-bat 

A term used with the expression "as queer as" to refer to someone strange or homosexual in a derogatory manner.
You think he's gay?

He's as queer as a football-bat.
football-bat by manning18 July 12, 2007