I didn’t know Larry was in his bedroom and when I walked in I caught him dick handed!
by Deathesquire August 24, 2023
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noun; A condition often observed after a man masturbates, or when a woman gropes a man's genitals, and fails to wash his/her hands sufficiently or at all afterwards. Symptoms may be less or more severe depending on the frequency and thoroughness with which the male washes his penis, and may include foul odor, damp skin, and in severe cases, the presence of semen on the sufferer's hand(s).
Even without close examination, I could tell by the smell that Tyler had contracted a severe case of dick hand.
by clint August 24, 2004
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The hand a prostitute uses to grab a dick.
This is my dick hand, and that is my pimp hand.
by Michalak October 4, 2003
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A girl with really soft hands and knows how to massage your dick well.
You have great Dick hands! Ahhh I love it when you touch my dick .
by Peanutbuttervibezz April 18, 2018
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A description of an individual who neglects to wash their hands after using the restroom. When refering to a specific individual, it becomes Dick Kands.
person 1: See that guy, hes got dick hands.
person 2: What a filthy fucking animal. What if someone shakes hands with him, and then eats?
person 1: That is a classic case of primary contact. Keep your hands to yourself. Its tough love, you know.

Upon a later encounter..

person 1: Hey, theres Dick Kands.
by The Dumpster June 20, 2006
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Shaking hands or touching someone after using the restroom and not washing your hands. Can be used in a prank or redemption situation.
After taking a piss at the bar I walked out and saw the lead singer to a band that sucked. i went up a shook his hand and thanked him for his show. All the while the singer never knew that he was dick handed.

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Later i saw a buddy in the bar. I walked up to him and shook his hand. Later noting to him that he just got - dick handed!
by edsned October 27, 2010
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Corporate franchise employee(s) responsible for preparing food and drink for the general public regardless of the fact that said employee may have a phallic protrusion growing on their hand(s). Also note this condition may be worsened by the growth coming into contact with (or being used to stir) hot beverages. It should also be noted that although not required, the "Dick Hand" in question is not required to be covered by food safe latex gloves - but indefinitely should be. See also "Sticky Bag".
"My whole afternoon was farruged as that horrible Dick Hand molested my delicious beverage - that moment changed my for life forever."
by Maradeath March 26, 2010
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