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57.
One who wants to maximize individual liberty and mimimize the role of the state. ("Live and let live," so to say.)

Government should protect and preserve life, liberty, and property, as well as intervene in the events of force and fraud. (Force, however, is OK when somebody trespasses onto your property and/or initiates violence against you or a loved or defenseless one.)

On the issues (Thanks to the U.S. Libertarian Party's official website)...

1. CRIME AND VIOLENCE: Protect victims' rights. End prohibition. Get tough on real crime (ones with actual victims). Protect the right to self-defense. Address the root causes of crime.

2(a). ENVIRONMENT - BASICS: Abolish sovereign immunity for government officials. Privatize "land and beast". Use tort (restitution) as a deterrent and restorative.

2(b). ENVIRONMENT - GLOBAL WARMING: Utilize non-government ways to put a stop to the "problem" we've been hearing about.

3. FAMILY BUDGETS: Knock down income and property taxes so families can put more money into their bank accounts and piggy jars. Utilize sales taxes to collect revenue.

4. FOREIGN POLICY: Non-interventionism. Use deterrence, and only attack when actually threatened or attacked. Free trade over foreign aid to help out developing nations. No conscription, period.

5. FREEDOM OF SPEECH: No censorship, no subsidization. Only intervene when there's coercion involved.

6. GUN LAWS: The right to bear arms. Encourage gun ownership, and invest in education and training programs to promote responsible gun ownership.

7. HEALTH CARE: Establish Medical Savings Accounts (MSAs). De-regulate the health care industry. Remove barriers to safe, affordable medicines.

8. INTERNET: Stop censorship.

9. IMMIGRATION: To immigrants, no welfare. And make sure you get screened for medical purposes and have had a police background check. Then you can enter LEGALLY.

10. POVERTY AND WELFARE: End welfare. Establish a dollar-for-dollar tax credit for contributions to private charity. Tear down barriers to entrepreneurism and economic growth. Reform education using the free market (or vouchers or tax credits).

11. PRIVACY: Repeal restrictions and regulations on the private development, sale, and use of encryption technology. No court-issued warrant detailing the time, place, and area to be searched, no search. No national ID card and no Social Security for ID purposes.

12. SOCIAL SECURITY: Sell all assets to make sure that America's promises are kept while pursuing IRAs (Individual Retirement Accounts) for the purpose of allowing citizens to control their own retirement.

13. TAXES: Privatize and cut taxes. Get Germany and Japan off of military welfare. Stop bailing out industries with taxpayers' money. Replace welfare with private charity. Sales taxes would be better than income and property taxes.
A Libertarian on the issues...

1. CRIME AND VIOLENCE: "How about monetary restitution for the victim instead of the death penalty? And let's legalize drugs, gambling, and prostitution, as long as it's consensual."

2(a). ENVIRONMENT - BASICS: "What the EPA says goes, politicians. It's time you guys sold some land to pay off the national debt. And I'm gonna take that guy to small claims court because he spilled oil on my front lawn."

2(b). ENVIRONMENT - GLOBAL WARMING: And I'll plant some trees to suck up that CO2, a'ight, you global-warming worrywarts?!"

3. FAMILY BUDGETS: "That FairTax is such a good idea. Instead of you taking my money, I'm GIVING it to you."

4. FOREIGN POLICY: "Do we really need to police the world or contribute troops to UN peacekeeping forces? I honestly would rather sign free trade agreements over foreign policies. Yeah, sure, jobs may be outsourced, but we should really knock down corporate taxes so we can compete for those jobs."

5. FREEDOM OF SPEECH: "Read the First Amendment."

6. GUN LAWS: "Read the Second Amendment. I'm training to use a gun responsibly, mind you. I won't shoot unless in self-defense, but I'll pay you money if I misfire my gun, a'ight?"

7. HEALTH CARE: "Let's find ways to lower costs instead of trying to find bureaucratic ways to foot the bill, OK, you Canadian-style health care lovers?"

8. INTERNET: "Read the First Amendment. Net Neutrality is an invasion by government into the free market -- let Internet providers shoot themselves in the foot."

9. IMMIGRATION: "Let's cut off welfare before we open the floodgates."

10. POVERTY AND WELFARE: "A job is better than welfare."

11. PRIVACY: "Read the Fourth Amendment. And stay out of my comp, unless you got a court-issued warrant!"

12. SOCIAL SECURITY: "IRAs R awesome. I could sell these assets to help pay the national debt."

13. TAXES: "Lower taxes by cutting the fat from the budget. Privatize, no military welfare, no corporate welfare, and private charity. Russ Feingold and all you other budget hawks in Congress, take notes."
by Obscure Anomaly September 02, 2006
 
22.
A Republican who wants to get high and look at porn.
"Dude, that guy's a Libertarian! What does that mean?"

"He's basically a Republican who likes porn."
by cheeze9037075 July 26, 2009
 
23.
A motley collection of neo-confederates, racists, neo-Nazis, Holocaust revisionists, tin-foil hat wearing conspiracy theorists, insecure wannabes and pretentious dicks who consider themselves superior to everyone else because they have heard of Murray Rothbard and the Austrian School of Economics.
"You're a sheep. Don't talk to me about economics. Your doctorate is useless. Do you know I've read somewhere once something about Murray Rothbard and the Austrian School of Economics? That's because I am a libertarian, and I know more than you! My neckbeard knows more than you! You're nothing more than an establishment sheep who cannot think for himself. I've a bigger dick than you, and Ron Paul has the biggest dick in Congress. Don't talk to me about measuring tapes or delusions of grandeur - science is a myth perpetuated by the federal government to take our liberty away!
by Misha A. February 03, 2013
 
24.
A person who believes there should be no government at all because they don't want to pay taxes. In order to support this view libertarians insist the government is completely corrupt and incapable while they use demonizing tactics against those who use or who are likely to use government programs intended to combat starvation and poverty, usually the poor and disabled. However, it's impossible to find a libertarian who will refuse government aid when they themselves become poor or disabled. This is because libertarians understand they are due reparations for the theft of their tax dollars, as is spelled out in the sacred governmental domination instruction manual known as the Constitution.
I'm a libertarian because I want the Constitution inside me.
by catcatcher April 17, 2010
 
25.
1)In America, this term is used to describe the economic policy known as liberalism in Europe and Latin America.
2)Also an anti-authoritarian ideology, usually associated with Anarchism.
1)Libertarians believe in free-market capitalism and property rights are a central tennet of their philosophy.
2)To avoid being confused with terrorists, anarchists sometimes call themselves libertarians.
by unem May 28, 2005
 
26.
In the classical sense an individual who favors liberty either in the service of society against tyranny or because the state has no compelling interest in certain behaviors.

In the contemporary sense, A stupid high school white boy who lives off if his parents and has never had anything bad happen to him.
Give me liberty or give me death.

Wow, what an asshole. He must be a little rich boy libertarian. Lets beat the shit out of him and teach him a lesson.....
by DKofML April 14, 2009
 
27.
A moron who thinks a completely unregulated economy somehow makes people more free. If they are on an online forum, their username will include the words "Taxpayer", "American" (if they're American, which they usually are), "Freedom", or "Liberty". They often have pictures of American flags or eagles to show their national pride. Even though they are extremely patriotic, they believe everything the government does is a huge conspiracy against them (unless the government is on their side on an issue, of course). They tend to be wealthy or at least middle class. They believe that all power should be transferred from the evil, tyrannical government to the rich who love and care about us. They believe in "self reliance" and that the world is completely fair. Libertarians believe everyone is on an equal playing field in life, whether you are from an affluent suburb with a two parent household or shitty neighborhood with a single mom who beats her children. They believe it's not the government's problem if people are poor, they deserve it. They believe the economy will magically fix itself.
Homeless man: Can I have some change, sir?
Libertarian: Get a fucking job, scumbag.
by a__Generic__Dude December 20, 2013
 
28.
If used in a non-political sense, "libertarian" simply makes no sense at all.
Me: I'd like a large popcorn with a libertarian amount of butter, please.

Cashier: wtf?
by longtimecaller July 05, 2010