Top Definition
A term used to describe a guy who wants to be cool but just ends up being more annoying than an 8 year old with ADHD who just drank 5 gallons of sugar-laden Kool-Aid.

(Note: Referred to as a "guy", although technically not a male - a large, untrimmed vag with pubic lice can be seen where the penis is usually found on a man.)
Girl: Do you hear that irritating motherfucker? Why is he fully grown, but still acts like my little sister in elementary school??

Guy: Yeah, he's a total Kerns. People always want to bitchslap the shit out of him, but it would feel too much like child abuse.
by tvrepairman October 22, 2010
To sleep with your mom, except not as a 4-year-old who's scared of the dark, but after you're well into adulthood.
Kerns: So mom, same place same time tonight? ;) (*cough* my room, midnight *cough*)

Guy nearby: Holy shit. Talk about the creepiest family of losers around.
by rodentcontrol October 29, 2011
A Kern was a Gaelic soldier, specifically a light infantryman during the Middle Ages.

Kern were light troops who relied on speed and mobility as armor. Sources describe the kern rushing into the attack, and then racing off so swiftly and nimbly that it was impossible for English troops to catch them. The dart was the weapon of choice for kern, the bow never achieving popularity in the country. It is from here that arised the legend of the fabled "irish ninja"

Also refers to "badass"
General 1: A Kern was a Gaelic soldier, specifically a light infantryman during the Middle Ages.

General 2: yes
by willkern March 30, 2009
One lets forth thy golden showers onto unsuspecting people in their sleep.
R. Kelly pulled a kern recently, and was shunned.
by Muddy Grimes April 04, 2005
Awesome beyond any and all comprehension.
Impressive beyond measurement or description.
That new invention is so kern, I can't imagine life without it.
He shattered the existing record with that kern performance.
by Smack Rattlecakes February 03, 2010
to kern is to excel in every aspect of life. common characteristics of someone kerning is being daf (down as farquad) and having dat professional swag.
dude, did you see that guy with the spicy node? He was totally kernin on em
by batesgotswag October 31, 2011
Free Daily Email

Type your email address below to get our free Urban Word of the Day every morning!

Emails are sent from We'll never spam you.