36
a person whos name is jared duh. hes weird and random at times and he also sings annoying songs that get stuck in my head. blahzerz!
jeny: jared your soo weird

jared: no u!

jeny: jk your cool

jared: no u!

jeny: aww thanks teehee!!

jared: no u!

jeny: k.. getting annoying now.

jared: lalalala

jeny: ah my ears!
by jeny March 01, 2008
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37
A really sweet, creative and super adorable guy! It's hard not to smile when you're around him. He can be kinda shy, but once he opens up he's like a whole new person! He also is very stylish and is in to fashion. He's also crazy talented in art and makes me green with envy.
Wow! That guy is so cute! He must be a Jared!
by Natella November 16, 2013
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38
A person you can count on to bring Alize to a party.
Do we have any Alize? No, but Jared should be here soon.
by fastwalker June 09, 2011
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39
(v.) the act of sodomizing an unsuspecting homosexual negroid; often results in the contraction of AIDS. When jareding, the perpetrator lures in a pack of niggers with a bucket of fresh KFC. As the apes feast on the chicken, he thoroughly inspects them, searching for the one with the largest, most African elephant dick.

Although penises with piercings and other tribal deformities are preferred, the largest cock will suffice for jareding. Once a suitable porch monkey is selected, he will coerce the creature with pictures of female apes. As the negroid achieves a massive erection, the jareder will sneak up and position his well greased anus above the shaft.

In one swift motion, the perpetrator impales his ass on the cock and rides it like a cowboy from Brokeback Mountain, eventually causing the negroid to ejaculate. In the final step of jareding, the sick fuck will proceed to collect the semen and pour it over fresh chalupas, as he is usually 13 year old faggot Taco Bell fanboy. As he eats the chalupas, the jareder smiles with joy stroking his tiny 2.3" dick to a picture of Jack Bauer, contemplating his next victim.
Blake: My asshole is feeling really tight, you wanna go jared tonight?

Jared: Sure Mr. Locati! I'd love to go, although I call dibs on your freshly made semen-covered tacos, I'm too much of a curly headed fucking jew to pay for Taco Bell! Did I mention I'm gay?
by Von Cockenberg January 02, 2011
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40
a gay right handed man that thinks he is good at everything and feels that google is the beholder of all.
I'm right,my name is jared.
by battery8765 September 27, 2007
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41
The most sexy/ sweet man alive has the biggest dick I've ever had the prettiest eyes best fighter strong

Incredible kisser and smart
Jared is amazing in bed
Jared is a good fighter
by Jared is the best March 04, 2017
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42
a total stud from Cali.
my boyfriend, my favorite, my love.
loves the Lord, loves his friends, loves his family.
will someday be an amazing husband and dad.
needs to come eat a mango with me, enjoys breakfast food, hates cherry flavored items. he's a eagle scout.
and he's mine.
everyone loves Jared who wouldn't? i sure do.

that guy is such a Jared wow, i want him.
by Kelcy February 06, 2008
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