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I'm Not There 

A film inspired by Bob Dylan's life.
The film jumps back and forth among six Dylan-esque characters each played by a different actor. Jude Quinn, the character most representative of Dylan's life in the mid- 60's is played by Cate Blanchett. This film contains many obvious and subtle references to Dylan's life and career.
Joshua: I had very little idea what was going on.
Lily: Like that time you saw I'm Not There.
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Hey mahn that's why i'm not there for! 

(Hey mahn that's why i'm not there for) this means as a insult and a mean thing to say for your family or friends! you could also use this word to be mad or pissed about something or being depressed! This is also a word for being mean to someone if their sad so you could keep them uncomfortable.
Hey do you want to go to space! Hey mahn that's why i'm not there for! :( oh ok.

i'm simply not there 

this is a refrence to american psycho its discribing how hes dead inside.
- i'm simply not there.
- jeez how dead inside are you?

Assuming I’m not in London I’m there!

A term coined by Gary J Redmond meaning I will certainly not be there but will let you know that an hour before.
Would you like to go for pints on Thursday? We did Thursday to suit you.
Oh sweet, Assuming I’m not in London I’m there!

There is a global pandemic going on and you’re worried about a banter fest. I’m definitely not going to attend, don’t know about the rest of you, but I care about my life 

The act of roasting physics teachers and messaging the whole sixth form about why attending a banter fest during a global pandemic is an inadvisable thing to do.
Physics teacher: Hey guys I organised a banter fest for you next Monday. It'll be really fun!
Sensible person: There is a global pandemic going on and you’re worried about a banter fest. I’m definitely not going to attend, don’t know about the rest of you, but I care about my life
Physics teacher: Oh I'm sorry I didn't...
Sensible person: There is a global pandemic going on and you’re worried about a banter fest. I’m definitely not going to attend, don’t know about the rest of you, but I care about my life
Physics teacher: *Leaves school to go live in a remote Siberian village*