An absolutely, ginormous, tub of lard on legs. We aren't just talking about your slightly obese English teacher here we're talking about those people whose appearance is more than physically disgusting. Usually at 5 feet tall maybe an inch or two larger and over two hundred pounds of "curves" they are usually seen at Walmart scarfing down food and driving around on scooters made for handicapped people. They love to troll the fresh produce section for random person to call anorexic. Prepare yourself for bad grammar, insults, and "curves" if you ever encounter one.
Dan: Holy shit Paul Hamplanet alert!
Paul: SHIT WHY IS THE WORLD SHAKING.
Hamplanet: YOU CAN'T HANDLE MUH CURVES!
Yet another "creative" insult for those of us that have any fat whatsoever.
Idiot 1: Why do ham planets always cut themselves? Stupid fatties.
Idiot 2: I was out drinking last night, and the ham planets were all over me, man.