Frequently prefixed by "pure", as a substitute for "very".
1. To be drunk, e.g. "I was pure goosed last night boss".
2.To be hungover, e.g. "I drank a bottle of gone-off whiskey last night. Pure goosed today".
3. To be caught committing an inappropriate or illegal act. e.g. "I got goosed by the shades (police) for my flagrant lack of pants"
4. To have rang someone's (mobile) phone and hung up after the first 2 rings, so the number will show up and the recipient will call you back, or alternatively, just to be a bollocks. e.g. "Michael goosed my phone"
5.To have grabbed someone's arse (archaic).
6. To have suffered an unfortunate event or set of circumstances, or to express sympathy with such a happening. e.g. Tony: "I fucked up my 'Introduction to Aromatherapy' exam again. "
Oliver: "Oh, goosed".
7. To play a practical joke on someone, or take revenge for such an act, e.g. "I'm gonna goose him good for posting those bondage photos on the Internet"
by Eldritch August 29, 2003
Top Definition
Old school definition: to pinch someone's buttocks, hopefully the opposite sex, but hey, you take what you get.

Always associated in my mind with a British accent....
Owww! You goosed me, you cheeky devil!
by badmartialarts October 15, 2004
To apply pressure on one's taint (or space between genitalia and anus), preferably of the opposite sex!
So she was walking up the stairs, when her boyfriend goosed her .
by JayK February 14, 2006
Mancunian slang for broken. Can also mean tired.
“The tires on my bike are goosed”

“I was goosed after running a triathlon”
by Peter 'The Fist' Swift February 17, 2008
Completely letting down friends or coworkers by not coming through on a simple task. When asked to right the situation, accomplish the bare minimum just to spite those around.
He really goosed everyone on bring chilli to work day.
by Cruzinbill April 15, 2014
1. The act in which a person screws something up, or to be a screw-up (being a "goose")
2. To be extremely drunk on the vodka brand "Grey Goose"
1. You: "Uh-oh, i forgot to give that woman her five dollars in change"

Me: "You goosed it, bud!"

2. You: "I drank so much last night that I don't remember anything"

Me: "You got really goosed on vodka and then passed out with that haggard ass chick.
by GooseMan March 26, 2013
The unfortunate act of failing to eject correctly from your fighter jet by hitting the canopy; resulting in death.
The film Top Gun depicts this act when Maverick's F-14 goes into a flat spin and his navigator, Goose, gets pooped on. Thus getting goosed.
by Gr8 ballz o fire February 13, 2011
To have sex with a girl with the intention of never calling or seeing her again.
Cody totally goosed that chick last night.


Gril 1: That guy still hasn't called me
Girl 2: Did you have sex with him?
Girl 1: Yeah, he was hot
Girl 2: You totally got goosed
by PartyBoy73 November 18, 2011
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