-Facial Hair.
-A long time, or a very far distance.
-A large amount of something.
-An exaggerated measurable estimation.

Informal language.
Usually used incorrectly and ridiculously at the wrong time, and too often.

Something tedious and time consuming might waste beards of your energy, or waste beards of your time.

Origin: The amount of time it takes a man to grow a decent beard is not quick, and a decent beard is at least down to the belt buckle.

Other forms:
v. beard-ificate(d),
-"Man you were in the bathroom for like twelve beards..."

-"Wow, you're really good at skipping stones! That last one went a beard out into the lake."

-"Johnny, did you take the trash out yet!?"
"Yeah mom! I took the trash out like one hundred beards-ago."

-"You ran that beard of a triathlon so fast! You got first place!"

-"Dude wanna go play beards and barbers at the park with Jack, Lizzy, and the gang?"
"Yeah but I can't, my teacher beard-ificated the amount of homework I had by nearly three beards-worth! I won't be done till like beard o'clock in the morning."

-"I just cut down a beards-worth of trees in my backyard, now the squirrels have no place to live."

-"Did you hear? Jackie's grandma died..."
"Oh yeah, I heard about that beards-ago dude..."
"But she only died yesturday..."
"I know."

-"You suck at Halo 2! Go grow a beard, noob!"
by Paulexander June 10, 2010
Top Definition
Any opposite sex escort taken to an event in an effort to give a homosexaul person the apperance of being out on a date with a person of the opposite sex.
Half of the women on the red carpet at the movie premier were not real dates, but beards.
by Rob October 29, 2004
a man or woman used as a cover for a gay partner
poor Jenny, she has no idea that she's been Allen's beard for the past 5 years
by Meadow Soprano September 23, 2005
A female or male(though,mainly female) who is used as a cover-up for a homosexual.
Eleanor Calder is so obviously a beard. Louis and Harry are together. Duh.
by Thorki July 07, 2012
The single most manly, and great thing a man can do. To have a beard is to be a true man. If you have a beard, show it off proudly, and enjoy the satisfaction of the envy in the eyes of people around you who don't have beards. If you don't have a beard, grow one. If you cant grow one and your not past puberty yet, hold out my young friend, your time will come. If you don't have a beard and your past puberty, go get that sex change you know you need.
True men that had beards: Jesus, Abe Lincoln, Paul Bunyan, Billy Mays, Jim Henson, George Washington Carver, Zach Galifianakis, Bill Murray, Macho Man Randy Savage, and many more.
by BeardedBadFish February 20, 2010
The best solution to any problem. A sort of spiritual band-aid that's only effective when used by men.
Dude, my girlfriend dumped me, but I grew this beard and now I feel great!
by sweatervest December 04, 2009
A common word used to address a homosexual's female friend who he takes around town; he normally calls this companion his "girlfriend" to prove to the world that he is a masculine, football watching, titty grabbing heterosexual male. Although, he may think that this so called 'image' is working, he's actually fooling himself. It's completely obvious to on-lookers that he is a flamboyant homo. Gayer than a chihuahua in pink shades.

Here are some warning signs that you may be a beard...

1. He wears more makeup than you.
2. He looks fucking FIERCE in pictures 'cause he smiles wit' his eyes.
3. Uses bronzer as blush
4. Plucks his own eyebrows and his eyebrows look more groomed than yours.
5. Stands with hands on his hips.
Who the hell does Gayfron think that he is fooling? We all know that Vanessa Hudgens is his beard.

Have you ever watched Sunset Tan? Nick's beard sort of looks like a tranny.
by Sharkie Sharks September 09, 2007
A condition that causes hair to grow from the chin and lower face. Symptoms include itching, divinity and gratuitous awesomeness.

Synonyms include: Jesus.
Oh Lord! Bless us and our kin with thy Beard and help our facial hair achieve but a portion of thine Beardly glory.
by Brahmes Christus March 24, 2011
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