Christmas is an ancient Pagan celebration of the birth of the sun that was later taken over by Christians and turned into the celebration of the birth of Jesus Christ. Nowadays this holidy has lost all meaning, and ties to religion as far as im concerned. It is currently used as a reason to consume more shit mass produced in Chinese sweatshops by children (and sold by a fat pedophile, see Santa), drink too much egg nog, and get fat by eating too much fucking ham.
Oh, its December, time to listen to the fat pedophile and sell out to the corporations by buying overpriced meaningless plastic "gifts" for all my family and friends....for Jesus.
Or as Jim Gaffigan once said in regards to Christmas.
"I'm gonna take this pine tree and stick it in the living room, then we're gonna put our socks above the fireplace...fill 'em with candy, them I'm gonna put some leaves on the cieling and see if I can get some action"
Or as Jim Gaffigan once said in regards to Christmas.
"I'm gonna take this pine tree and stick it in the living room, then we're gonna put our socks above the fireplace...fill 'em with candy, them I'm gonna put some leaves on the cieling and see if I can get some action"
by Spenc3rr October 31, 2007
A holiday supposedly celebrating the birth of Jesus Chirst, man who meant well but now is the cause of all the problems in the world because people missinterpretted him. But I digress, Chirstmas has been bastardized by Capitalists in the western society. It is nothing more than a holiday based on commercial greed.
Billy:"My teacher says that if I'm good Santa will give me presents!"
Some guy who knows what he is talking about: Well little Billy, your teacher is a lying fuck face. Christmas is nothing but an excuse for capitalists to get money. Capitalists are evil bastards. They shall all die.
Some guy who knows what he is talking about: Well little Billy, your teacher is a lying fuck face. Christmas is nothing but an excuse for capitalists to get money. Capitalists are evil bastards. They shall all die.
by Karl Marx October 26, 2004
A day that somehow went from the birth of christ to a day where a fat man in a red suit goes down your chimmney and leaves things under a tree that you have for some reason placed in your house. If you are good you get a gift, and if your 'naughty' you get a lump of coal, which really is a fire hazard come to think of it. Also a day where children throw tantrums because they did not recieve the pony they just HAD to have.
Little Becky didn't get her pony from the fat man in the red suit on christmas, so she vowed to make sure there was a big fire in the fireplace next year.
by LeDuh November 1, 2006
by Frogbutt December 1, 2004
by M-boy February 15, 2006
The season when you're forced to be happy. If your not, a fat communist comes and beats you up. He enslaves little people who make stuff and fuel consumerism. The fat man in red breaks into your house and delivers gifts which your parents pay for. None of the gifts are free and the 'santa' man is secretly a trillionaire who sells people stuff. Santa is communist but he has his factory in china where he makes the cheap plastic toys.
Society: Santa Claus is coming to town
Me: Christmas already!? It's the jolly fat man! Run for your lives!
Me: Christmas already!? It's the jolly fat man! Run for your lives!
by The Intimidating British Guy August 12, 2021
by One little hellian February 10, 2017