Jeff
I was minding my business as usual when all of a sudden I was slapped in the face by the salami of a Jeff. A nice surprise ;)
Jeff by clever bastard August 24, 2011
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Jeff
A highly intelligent, very outgoing individual with overwhelming wit and charm. A Jeff has the ability to humble you with praise and love then instantly turn and smack you off the pedestal he has placed you on. He is unsure of himself and everyone else, does not trust, does not believe, and is not easily loved. A Jeff is constantly tormented by his insecurities. A Jeff needs a very patient, strong and passionate partner, one who realizes while there may be times to take a few steps away, it is not necessary to turn and shoot. If a Jeff manages to to come to terms with his own true worthiness, the partner of a Jeff will likely be rewarded for their patience and perseverance with unconditional love and undying devotion.
The Jeffness of it all is exhausting.
Jeff by TheFutureMrs.Brewer November 20, 2011
Jeff
Jeff: The single most hip individual in the Universe. He is incredibly beautiful, speaks 23 languages, and plays every musical instrument ever invented. He is loved by all that meet him and in fact the Grateful Dead actually followed Jeff across the country for over 15 years. Women can not be in his presence for more than 20 minutes because of dehydration risk. This is due to the spontaneous orgasms they experience upon laying their eyes on him. Jeff is also the kindest person in the Universe and once kissed a sloth which later turned it into Taylor Swift.
Jeff only speaks to beautiful women. If you find yourself in the presence of Jeff you should first give the 2 finger peace sign salute in greeting. Jeff will then bless you by granting 3 wishes. Aftweward, Jeff will fly you to his bungalow on the dark side of the moon and make mad passionate love to you for a minimum of 14 hours. At which point he will stop and make you breakfast. All your former friends will hate you for the perfection you have then become.
Jeff only speaks to beautiful women. If you find yourself in the presence of Jeff you should first give the 2 finger peace sign salute in greeting. Jeff will then bless you by granting 3 wishes. Aftweward, Jeff will fly you to his bungalow on the dark side of the moon and make mad passionate love to you for a minimum of 14 hours. At which point he will stop and make you breakfast. All your former friends will hate you for the perfection you have then become.