18 definitions by titwanker

titwank

The act of pleasuring oneself by thrusting the erect member between a generous pair of bristols. Typically concludes with the delivery of a pearl necklace.

Phwoaar! She's got a shirtfull. I'd love a good titwank in those.

by titwanker April 10, 2003

titwank

The mans entirely unselfish act of thrusting between a generous pair of bristols for sexual gratification. Usual result is referred to as a Pearl Necklace.

Phwoaar! She's got a shirtfull. I couldn't half fancy a titwank in those.

by titwanker April 10, 2003

toerag

More commanly used in the sixties and seventies on Britcoms before trms like plonker and wanker superseded it.

You dirty little toerag

by titwanker April 12, 2003

arsebandit

Male homosexual. A.K.A. knobjockey, turdburglar, shitstabber, pillowbiter, shirtlifter, brownhatter, ginger, iron, fucking bender.

Michael Barrymore? Someone ought to top that fucking murdering arsebandit.

by titwanker April 10, 2003

wanker

Definitively, an onanist, one (usually expected to be male) who enjoys unassisted sexual gratification. Colloquially, anybody of whom you have a low opinion.

Tony Blair? Fucking gutless, worthless, complete and utter WANKER!!

by titwanker April 10, 2003

shagnasty

Unpleasant, grimy, unhygeinic, generally undesirable. Can be used as a verb or an adjective.

Oi, Shagnasty.
You spunk swallowing shagnasty fuckpig.

by titwanker April 10, 2003

tithead

English derogatory term for Police Constable. Derived from the shape of the standard issue bobby's helmet. That's 'helmet' as in hat.

Put yer chopper away. There's a tithead comin' round the corner.

by titwanker July 31, 2003