18 definitions by titwanker

Top Definition
The act of pleasuring oneself by thrusting the erect member between a generous pair of bristols. Typically concludes with the delivery of a pearl necklace.
Phwoaar! She's got a shirtfull. I'd love a good titwank in those.
by titwanker April 10, 2003

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Anybody who spends the small hours of the morning searching this website.
Oh Fuck!! I'm a saddo.
by titwanker July 20, 2004

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A Festival of Wank. A Proliferation of toss. An excess of jizz. A massive accumulation of useless remnants resulting from a bunch of wankers tossing all over their keyboards.
UrbanDictionary is a total wankfest.
by Titwanker May 22, 2004

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The mans entirely unselfish act of thrusting between a generous pair of bristols for sexual gratification. Usual result is referred to as a Pearl Necklace.
Phwoaar! She's got a shirtfull. I couldn't half fancy a titwank in those.
by titwanker April 10, 2003

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Male homosexual. A.K.A. knobjockey, turdburglar, shitstabber, pillowbiter, shirtlifter, brownhatter, ginger, iron, fucking bender.
Michael Barrymore? Someone ought to top that fucking murdering arsebandit.
by titwanker April 10, 2003

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Beef curtains. In polite circles, used as a euphemism to avoid the more direct reference to cunt.
Fucking Jesus! That tart's skirt is showing her pissflaps.
by titwanker May 29, 2003

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Unpleasant, grimy, unhygeinic, generally undesirable. Can be used as a verb or an adjective.
Oi, Shagnasty.
You spunk swallowing shagnasty fuckpig.
by titwanker April 10, 2003

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