Top Definition
dope, idiot, moron, wally, pillock, dunderhead, dimwit
You are such a plonker, Rodney.
by Jackson Pillock January 13, 2003

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the term plonker started out as a reference to someone who was forever drunk on cheap wine (cheap wine is nicknamed plonk) this person was usualy a homeless person, or poor person.

today the term plonker is a very light hearted insult. Its not even seen as an insult, its like calling someone a wally. Its in no way ment maliciously. you call someone a plonker when they say or do something stupid.
bob - why didnt my food cook ?
john - you never turned on the oven, you plonker.
by Emperor Bubba February 01, 2005

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a willy! or a dopey person
rodney u plonker!
by deepcoveruk February 03, 2003

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A game similar to conkers that involves two men and their genitalia.

Each man takes it in turn to whack the opponents balls with their penis. The receiver must ensure that their penis is held firmly up and out of the firing line so as not to interfear with a clean whack. This is repeated until the lesser man concedes defeat and the dispute is settled.
"Man i think your girlfriends hot; I'll give you a game of plonkers for her"
by TheGayMaker December 13, 2007

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Someone whose words are not worth reading.
See also plonk.
"Sheesh, what a plonker, I just forwarded all mail from him to the bit bucket.
by Aliza250 August 25, 2005

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someone stupid.
someone who is scared of and gets attacked by squirrels is a plonker.
by xJess. June 25, 2010

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Nursery word for poos, after the 'plonk' they make when they hit the water.
Oh look, you forgot to flush the toilet and it's full of plonkers!
by David from Kingsbury January 18, 2006

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