668 definitions by michael foolsley

self explanatory

keep your fucking cart away from the cold case so I can get to it, you idiot!
keep the strait jacket on your crotch fruit!! -control the 'howling' and running wild, arms flailing!!!
don't stop in the MIDDLE of an aisle or pedestrian walkway to 'ponder' -get fucking moving!
-get fucking moving, period!!! this includes haggling over two cents from a fucking coupon!! (-yah, but the circular says....)
laura mcfoolsis thought it was all about her, she had no concept of grocery store etiquette!!
by michael foolsley December 08, 2009
any form of transportation: car, plane, motorcycle weed, lsd, sex, etc -anything that gets one from point a to point b!!
that bitch was QUALITY transpo!!

got me some new transpo!

lets' take my transpo! aint'snt got no transpo!
by michael foolsley November 27, 2009
so hugely and pathetically fat, that rolls of fat bounce and jounce and largely work against easy mobility.
damn! that bitch is SLOPPY FAT!
by michael foolsley November 19, 2009
something 'tainted' and no longer 'holy'! impure is commonly used in the catholic church. i really like to use it as a more general term for something that is no longer unsullied,virgin,deflowered,dirty,wrecked/destroyed; generally no longer 'pure' -something that now is no longer 'holy'...
a guy crashed into my new car, and even with body work, it is now rendered impure!!

that person soiled my new (???) even after a cleaning; it is now impure!!

after stepping in dog flops, i couldn't help feeling my new TEVA sandals were rendered impure!
by michael foolsley September 05, 2013
a common reference by parents for kids getting a 'ride' in a police car.

this was used almost as much as "put your eye out", ANOTHER phrase APPARENTLY in the 'parent handbook', i became EXTREMELY weary of hearing!!
i'm not coming to the police station when you get picked up!

the jenkins boys were constantly getting picked up for various infraction/s.

the police picked up a couple in a church parking lot trying to 'sock it home'
by michael foolsley June 19, 2012
pre-birth! -your first (subliminal) knowledge of the 'greatness of life', -before finding yourself in the hands of a gynecological nurse, awash in after-birth, all a-yowl!!...
for years i've been trying to find a way back to that catered hot-tub party

snapped to with a yowl!! after the catered hot-tub party!!
by michael foolsley October 31, 2011
the stomach orgasm; (unisex) upon eating some 'magic' food, ones' guts and taste buds begin to experience a 'transcendental' bliss, where one seemingly leaves the bonds of gravity (like in REAL sex!!)

-the eyes roll back and the mind 'orbits saturn', while many 'g' s of gravitational force are felt. after a second or two, one is back for "another taste" (like in REAL sex!!) (-serving as somewhat of a suicide deterrent!!)
haley had a gut nut while eating that godiva 'chaw' clit!!

the maine lobster swimming in butter gave mike a gut nut!

a gut nut was what joe was having from the sirloin-burger!!

celestina gut nutted from the walnut-tofu!
by michael foolsley June 11, 2011

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