jimmy patrick's definitions

tugspot

A place used for masterbation.

Also can refer to a masterbatory stain.

Dude, your mom's bedroom makes for an excellent tugspot!

by jimmy patrick February 19, 2008

jerk jacket

A special rain slicker worn while masterbating to deter any errant cum strands.

Also refers to a condom worn only to jerk off into.

Whoa, whoa, hold your horses there tiger, lemme get my jerk jacket on first!

by jimmy patrick February 19, 2008

masterbatory

1. adj. used when someone is hot enough to jank to.

2. n. A special place (study, lavatory, closet used for masterbatory sessions.

3. n. Laboratory specially designed for studying masterbation.

1. Holy shit, I met Kristen's little sis last week, girl is fully masterbatory!

2. If you'll excuse me, I need to step into the masterbatory for a quick tug.

by jimmy patrick February 19, 2008

Bad Santa

Amazingly underrated comedy boasting a hilarious Brett Kelly as "The Kid" and Billy Bob Thornton (in his greatest performance since Sling Blade) as a foul-mouthed, alcoholic Santa Claus.

John Ritter's last film before his death, and one of the most politically incorrect movies of all time.

A Christmas story in a category of its own.

Bad Santa could have been terrible, but the excellent casting made it incredible.

by jimmy patrick February 25, 2008

mastastic

adj.

When something is so good you could jank to it.

Also, a really amazing masterbatory session.

Christ, you see that short skirt? Bitch be mastastic son!

I know, I had a mastastic jank sess to her the other night, I'm still sore!

by jimmy patrick February 19, 2008

dick clique

A group of popular dudes, usually fratty jocks, who are into date-raping their underage cousins (and each other).

"Fuckin' dick clique made me drink their loogies today in the cafeteria, God I hate those assholes!"

by jimmy patrick February 15, 2008

blood

The best lube, ever!

Blood is the best lube ever!

by jimmy patrick February 21, 2008