creaternity's definitions

seat protector

A large rounded piece of tissue paper that is designed to be placed over a toilet seat to protect the shitter from "germs" that may be residing there. The rounded section lies on top of the toilet seat (thus creating the essential Buttock-porcelain Barrier) while a cutout center flap hangs down into the toilet causing the entire paper to be sucked into the toilet when it is flushed. Seat protectors are typically contained in a dispenser on the wall of a public bathroom stall in such venues as airports and offices.
Note that the Buttock-Porcelain Barrier provided by the seat protector creates a false sense of security since someone else's bodily fluid on the toilet seat can leak right through the S.P.'s thin, porous surface. I doubt germs are foiled either.

Toilet User: Damn these seat protectors! I can't get one out of the dispenser without ripping it!

Toilet User: Ugh! Who keeps using 20 seat protectors at a time and clogging the handicap stall?

by creaternity May 23, 2006

spinning

New form of group exercise in which a dozen or more people (usually women) sit on indoor stationary bikes together and pedal to the sound of music and the directions of an instructor.

Girl 1: Wanna come to the gym with me and take a spinning class?
Boy 1: Um, I think I'll just go outside and ride my bike, but thanks anyway.

Girl 2: Wanna come to the gym with me and take a spinning class?
Boy 2: Hmm, am I in the mood do some real exercise and lift weights or stare at 20 spandexed girl butts for an hour? Hard decision.....

by creaternity May 1, 2006

pitwind

the vile draft of B.O. that surrounds a person with poor hygiene or poor grasp of the deoderant concept

You can smell Landphil's pitwind coming long before he's in sight.

by creaternity May 15, 2006

gaymunity

the immunity you get from your parents for whatever they know about your sex/dating life because your brother or sister is gay

My mother would never let my boyfriend and me sleep in the same room at her house except for the gaymunity I have from my lesbian sister.

My parents have stopped lecturing me about "living in sin" ever since they found out the truth about my brother's "roommate"; I love the new gaymunity.

by creaternity April 6, 2006

flushinator

One of those damn toilets that flushes automatically, usually found in public restrooms. There's a little "eye" in the back (yes, creepy) that is supposed to sense when you get off the can so it can flush for you, just in case you are one of those doochebags who doesn't know how the little lever works. (Who ARE the people who DON'T flush???) Unfortunately, the "eye" often makes mistakes, causing the toilet to flush prematurely, thus splashing one's posterior with toilet water. Yuck.

Coworker 1: I hate the flushinator.
Coworker 2: Yeah, tell me about it. The one in the third stall gave my boys a douche this morning.

by creaternity July 10, 2006

500 dollar lane

The breakdown lane on a highway. Why? Because that's how much money you gotta pay if a cop catches you driving in it.

(Can also mean the leftmost lane for trucks when they are only allowed to drive on the right.)

Passenger: This traffic sux! Let's take the 500 dollar lane.
Driver: Okay, but only if you'll front the $500 when statey sees us.

by creaternity May 12, 2006

helicopter mom

A hovering & controlling, but well-meaning, parent who gets way too involved in her child's life to the point of doing things that are completely inappropriate, such as personally attending all of little Sweetiepie's extracurricular activities, writing medium-sized Sweetiepie's school application essays, and submitting full-grown Sweetiepie's job applications.

Suzy's job interview was rendered very awkward by the fact that her helicopter mom insisted on accompanying her.

Joey moved across the country to escape his helicopter mom, but she still calls him six times a day.

by creaternity November 19, 2006