creaternity's definitions

CFO

Chief Financial Officer
Close cousin to the CEO, except this is the guy who's in charge of coordinating a company's insider trading and profit inflation scams and getting the documents shredded afterwards.

Andrew Fastow, the former CFO of Enron, is in jail for helping orchestrate one of the biggest corporate investment scams of the century. His boss, CEO Kenneth Lay, pretended he didn't know what Fastow was up to in order to save his own ass. What a bunch of scumbags.

by creaternity April 30, 2006

lineup

A police technique in which a handful of people fitting a similar description are stood in a line together for a witness of a crime to see. The witness is then supposed to pick out the perp.

They had to let the suspect walk after the witness couldn't pick him out of a lineup.

by creaternity May 13, 2006

cab

1. a taxi (a yellow car with a sign on top that will drive your ass around town for a price calculated per minute or per mile)

2. a switch jump on a skateboard, snowboard, or skiis in which you start fakie, spin at least 360 and land forward (named after Steven Caballero)

1. If you don't want to get on the subway with the hoi polloi and can't afford a chauffeur, you can always take a cab.

2. We spent all afternoon practicing cabs on the halfpipe.

by creaternity May 31, 2006

utilize

A substitute for the word "use" to be employed when you want to make something sound more important or difficult than it really is.

Person says: "We utilize an alphabetical schematic to organize our records."
Translate: "We file documents alphabetically."

by creaternity April 18, 2006

clickaholic

Somebody who believes that, by mouse clicking repeatedly on an icon or button, he/she will make the computer/website respond faster.
Sadly, this behavior can actually make a computer run slower. Often, the clickaholic knows this, but can't control the compulsion to click obsessively anyway.
Clickaholics are also known to apply the same philosophy in analagous situations, such as pressing the return key.

Clickaholic: click click click click
Computer: ......
Clickaholic: Dammit! Why won't this program open already??
Computer: .....
Clickholic: click CLICK CLICK CLICK!!!!!

by creaternity April 29, 2006

helicopter mom

A hovering & controlling, but well-meaning, parent who gets way too involved in her child's life to the point of doing things that are completely inappropriate, such as personally attending all of little Sweetiepie's extracurricular activities, writing medium-sized Sweetiepie's school application essays, and submitting full-grown Sweetiepie's job applications.

Suzy's job interview was rendered very awkward by the fact that her helicopter mom insisted on accompanying her.

Joey moved across the country to escape his helicopter mom, but she still calls him six times a day.

by creaternity November 19, 2006

500 dollar lane

The breakdown lane on a highway. Why? Because that's how much money you gotta pay if a cop catches you driving in it.

(Can also mean the leftmost lane for trucks when they are only allowed to drive on the right.)

Passenger: This traffic sux! Let's take the 500 dollar lane.
Driver: Okay, but only if you'll front the $500 when statey sees us.

by creaternity May 12, 2006