Sam is a Dick's definitions

free tour

When a girl gives a guy a small amount of sexual gratification, but withholds the rest until he commits to a relationship.

Last night she gave me the free tour, but I'm definitely gonna subscribe.

by Sam is a Dick November 13, 2006

Macs or PC's

The stupidest argument in the history of stupid arguments, between two sides who both tell huge lies. Neither one can concede the fact that everything does everything, Macs do business projects equally well and PCs do creative projects equally well. Macs don't get viruses or worms (usually), PCs have more software written to them.

"Macs or PC's?"

"Why are you bothering me with asking? Go away I hate you I hate your mother too!"

by Sam is a Dick October 17, 2006

Manbearpig

When you can't actually argue with someone based on facts so you just make fun of them instead.

Trey Parker and Matt Stone are too stupid to actually argue global warming based on science, so they decided to manbearpig Al Gore.

by Sam is a Dick March 3, 2007

walking canister of every disease ever transmitted sexually.

The name speaks for itself. Someone who gets around and not in a glorious way. The kind of person you're reluctant to shake hands with if you're not wearing both rubber gloves and a space suit.

Don't go out with that girl. Sure she's easy but she's a walking canister of every disease ever transmitted sexually.

by Sam is a Dick May 23, 2007

sheepshagger

A Scotsman, so named due to the rural nature of the traditional Scottish economy and the predominance of sheep herding.

That William Wallace was a sheepshagger if ever I saw one.

Why do Scotsmen wear kilts? Sheep can hear zippers.

by Sam is a Dick October 24, 2006

designated hippie

The at least one hippie in every undergraduate classroom, who spends all their time in that class talking hippie shit and being generally arrogant. Ironically they usually become Republicans after graduating.

Sometimes shortened as D.H., a reference to the designated hitter rule in baseball.

Oh geez did you hear what the fucking designated hippie said in class today? Worst thing is it had nothing to do with what was going on in class.

by Sam is a Dick October 13, 2006

Conservative

Old definition: One who wishes to preserve old evils as opposed to a liberal who clamors for new ones.

New definition: Someone who believes in ultra-fascist government where a single leader makes all decisions and is unquestionable, combined with a radical upward redistribution of income and cruelty for the fun of it; as opposed to a liberal who wants to dismantle the military, trust terrorists not to hurt us, and eat the rich. One of two classes of fuckwit in this country.

How dare you attack the integrity of the president in front of me, I'm a conservative you know.

by Sam is a Dick April 25, 2007