Sam is a Dick's definitions

vampire

Something that doesn't exist.

If you say you're a vampire, you're just a fucking idiot.

Joey started calling himself Lord Thisangar and saying he was a vampire. I responded by crushing his windpipe and telling him that if he was really a vampire there's no way that could hurt him.

by Sam is a Dick October 6, 2007

whig party

A party held by white high-school kids in the affluent suburbs where they listen to the latest rap CDs and try desperately to be black.

In this case whig is short for whigger.

Two black guys showing up for fifteen minutes before leaving because it's lame does not change the fact that it's a whig party.

by Sam is a Dick October 30, 2006

j00b

Someone who is somehow a n00b at being Jewish. A j00b may be uncircumcised, eat pork regularly, or have no strong religious beliefs.

Dude you left that penny on the ground, you are such a j00b!

by Sam is a Dick November 10, 2006

toss the tuna salad

To eat pussy, so called because it smells like tuna.

Baby I wanna take you home and toss the tuna salad all night.

by Sam is a Dick October 31, 2006

Hummer owner

The reason why gas prices are so high!

All Hummer owners should be sent to Iraq. They want the oil so bad they can get it their damned selves.

by Sam is a Dick April 3, 2007

internet

A series of tubes, definitely not a truck, intended for porn porn porn.

Ted Stevens from Alaska is the foremost expert on the internet.

by Sam is a Dick December 7, 2006

country club conservative

The same thing as a limousine or latte liberal but on the other end of the spectrum. They talk about people working their way up, but they themselves grew up wealthy and never had a job that daddy's friends didn't set them up with, and wouldn't have kept those jobs on their own. They want the government out of everybody's lives until it's time to parcel out the subsidies.

The only major difference between them and limousine liberals is that they play more golf.

Limo Lib: "Every time I drive my Lexus to Starbucks I feel so sad for all those poor people I see. The government should give them all of someone else's money, as long as it's not mine"

Country Club Conservative: "Oh big deal. They're just too lazy to hire a lobbyist to get money for them."

by Sam is a Dick March 30, 2007