Sam is a Dick's definitions

New Hampshire

A fireworks store with a meth lab in back.

Everyone in New Hampshire is thinking about how they'd like to be out of New Hampshire.

by Sam is a Dick November 23, 2006

high-functioning neurotypical

A neurotypical with just enough autistic traits to be tolerable.

These positive traits include:
Not needing to make small talk
Not playing head games
Not playing office politics
Prefering function over prettiness
Not complaining that you hurt their feelings every five seconds
Willingness to discuss things over e-mail rather than phone (bonus points if they prefer this)

In time it is hoped that these neurotypicals might learn to pass for aspie.

This website was designed by a really high-functioning neurotypical, you can tell because it actually works.

by Sam is a Dick October 25, 2006

vampire

Something that doesn't exist.

If you say you're a vampire, you're just a fucking idiot.

Joey started calling himself Lord Thisangar and saying he was a vampire. I responded by crushing his windpipe and telling him that if he was really a vampire there's no way that could hurt him.

by Sam is a Dick October 6, 2007

Muff College

A small college in Northampton, MA where muff is everyone's favorite food.

Don't bother talking to that girl, she goes to Muff College.

by Sam is a Dick February 3, 2007

Jena 6

Six high schoolers who were told to ignore a racially motivated threat against their lives. They retaliated by jumping one of the instigators, beating him unconscious. They were charged with attempted murder and conspiracy to commit murder. Apparently a shoe is now a weapon of murder.

The Jena 6 should've finished the job on a kid who thought it was funny to threaten their lives.

by Sam is a Dick October 30, 2007

Macs or PC's

The stupidest argument in the history of stupid arguments, between two sides who both tell huge lies. Neither one can concede the fact that everything does everything, Macs do business projects equally well and PCs do creative projects equally well. Macs don't get viruses or worms (usually), PCs have more software written to them.

"Macs or PC's?"

"Why are you bothering me with asking? Go away I hate you I hate your mother too!"

by Sam is a Dick October 17, 2006

Libertarian

Someone who believes that the government is evil but giant corporations would never do anything bad.
Someone who believes that a company's right to make money is more important than the people's right to breathe.
Someone who gets indignant when I kick him in the nuts for blowing smoke in my face.
Someone ranting about the government, usually from the back of a cop car.
The grown up (sort of) equivalent of a kid punching his fist in the air and saying "if you get hit it's your own fault."
Someone too stupid to whack off and pass gas at the same time.

John says he refuses to pay his taxes because he's a Libertarian. The judge didn't share his perspective.

by Sam is a Dick April 3, 2007