PositiveZero's definitions
Almost having sex, but having the universe dick you over in some way. Like, so close that, could you freeze-frame the moment and displace a single electron one nanometer, sex would've occurred.
Guy1: She was totally into it, but wanted to wait until the next day to do it for the first time. Then she got back together with her boyfriend the next morning.
Guy2: Shoulda sealed the deal that night.
Guy1: Yeah, I got quantum-fucked.
Guy2: Shoulda sealed the deal that night.
Guy1: Yeah, I got quantum-fucked.
by PositiveZero January 13, 2009
Get the quantum-fuckedmug. So the guy just picked up this clearly male squirrel, broke its neck, set it on fire, and started buttfucking it, cuz he's into homopyronecrobeastiality.
by PositiveZero November 1, 2005
Get the homopyronecrobeastialitymug. Sexual attraction to extraterrestrials.
You think your girlfriend's a freak? Mine's into xenophilia - I have to wear green antennae every time I wanna have sex.
by PositiveZero December 3, 2005
Get the xenophiliamug. A quality possessed by hot girls; a portmanteau of damage and majesty. Derived from the fact that most hot girls have a myriad of psychological issues stemming from years of abuse by step-fathers and boyfriends selected for their desirably abusive tendencies.
VJ: Dude, that girl's so HOT. Look at all that majesty.
Mike: Whatever, dude - you see blond locks; I see damage.
VJ: Still, look at all that damagesty.
Mike: Whatever, dude - you see blond locks; I see damage.
VJ: Still, look at all that damagesty.
by PositiveZero January 27, 2007
Get the damagestymug. When two people interlock faces such that each of their mouths is close to the other's ear. This is generally the only way to have a conversation in a crowded club or bar.
"I got the digits of this girl that was probably pretty hot. I'm not sure though, I didn't get a good look at her since we had to ear-69 to talk."
by PositiveZero June 19, 2008
Get the ear-69mug. The observed phenomenon that the shit cycles of men who coexist together (such as in prisons, convents, bordellos, dormitories, etc.) will tend to become synchronized over time.
Guy 1: I gotta take a shit.
Guy 2: Whatever, dude - you know the boss is gonna follow you right in, right?
Guy 1: Yeah, fecal synchrony is a bitch.
Guy 2: Whatever, dude - you know the boss is gonna follow you right in, right?
Guy 1: Yeah, fecal synchrony is a bitch.
by PositiveZero March 7, 2007
Get the fecal synchronymug. Complete engrossment in one's Blackberry, resulting in voluntary blindness and total ignorance of one's environment.
VJ: Dude why did you plow over that old lady?
Mike: I just had to finish the last line of that email. Total blackberry blindness.
Mike: I just had to finish the last line of that email. Total blackberry blindness.
by PositiveZero April 11, 2008
Get the Blackberry blindnessmug.