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Keifermail's definitions

trauma seeking behavior

Person engaged in a dangerous act with the most likely conclusion is their ending up a patient in a trauma unit.
An idiot riding a wheelie down the interstate at 70 mph with no helmet.

"Rick must be drunk, wrestling an alligator is trauma seeking behavior."
by keifermail August 21, 2008
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Beer Vest

n. a drunks belief that no harm will befell them whilst engaged in risky behavior. Usually directly correlated to the amount of alcohol consumed. Not to be confused with Drunk Luck whereas most drunks are able to avoid injury when in accidents.
"Once he got his Beer Vest on, he jumped from the roof into the shallow end of the pool."

"Billy spent half the night putting on his Beer Vest, then he jumped off the dock and wrestled the gator."
by keifermail August 21, 2008
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Percocet Whore

n. A person (not always a female) who has become so addicted to percocet that they will have sex for Percocets when none are available. The irony being that a percocet is generally sold for less than one minimum wage hour and if you offered the same person the cash instead of the pill they would retort, "I ain't no cheap whore. If you want to pay someone $5 for a blow job go find a crack whore."
"Man, Courtney is such a percocet whore. I told her I had three pills and she came over and fucked my brains out. I only gave her two pills. If you want some of that just call her up and tell her you got some Percs."
by keifermail August 22, 2008
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drug seeker

n. a person who goes to the docter/ER feigning illness in the hopes that they may receive a prescription for their drug of choice. Characterized by the person claiming to have allergies to every drug but the one they want. Much to the seekers dismay, health care providers are taught in school to recognize their obvious addiction.
"Don't believe him, Floyd is a drug seeker; allergic to everything but Percocet, he's here everyday, and was arrested last week for blowing a guy for half a perc."
by keifermail August 23, 2008
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two backed beast

N. Old literary term for sexual copulation. The most famous being a quote from William Shakespeare's Othello where Iago informs the King that his daughter has been having sex with a black man. Though modern high school students generally assume that making the two back beast is a reference to doing it doggy style the literal meaning in the 15th century was sex face to face or in the missionary position.
"If you tell Momma I was spying on you, then I'll tell her you and Jorge were making the two backed beast."

William Shakespeare. Othello. (1605): Iago: ' I am one, sir, that comes to tell you, your daughter and the Moor are now making-the-beast-with-two-backs .'
by keifermail August 22, 2008
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FUG

Mike tried to set me up with his sister but I saw her once at the pool and she is a FUG.
by keifermail August 28, 2008
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beerterrogation

A process of extracting secret information from someone by getting them drunk and thereby loosening their ability to control their tongue.
We took the manager out and did some shots and pitchers. The beerterrogation worked, before long he admitted layoffs were coming.
by keifermail October 2, 2008
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