Keifermail's definitions

Teleprompter

Barack Obama'sCrutch and lifeline.

His teleprompter went out and now he has telepromptourettes.

by keifermail August 8, 2009

Asskissitis

Contagious disease that is caused by employees seeing others getting promoted by kissing the bosses ass and they follow suit. Symptoms include brown nose and lips with blindness to the bosses ineptitude.

Have you seen how brown Sheila's lips are lately, looks like she has a bad case of asskissitis.

by keifermail June 29, 2009

manually express semen

To masturbate to completion. Jacking off to orgasm.

I went to donate some sperm and she handed me a cup and said "Please manually express semen into this cup.' I was like, "Speak English lady."
"Go jack your dick and come into this cup," she said.

by keifermail July 12, 2009

drug seeker

n. a person who goes to the docter/ER feigning illness in the hopes that they may receive a prescription for their drug of choice. Characterized by the person claiming to have allergies to every drug but the one they want. Much to the seekers dismay, health care providers are taught in school to recognize their obvious addiction.

"Don't believe him, Floyd is a drug seeker; allergic to everything but Percocet, he's here everyday, and was arrested last week for blowing a guy for half a perc."

by keifermail August 23, 2008

God's Cruel Joke

A large penis on an unattractive man.

"Ever notice all the tards have huge cocks. Man, God's cruel joke."

by keifermail August 8, 2009

low rider

Refers to homosexual men wearing their pants low on the hip to expose colorful underwear in an attempt to attract a mate. The low riding pants signifies easy access to the mans rear compartment and not so subtly letting the other man know that he is on the down low.

"Since I been wearing my FUBU's low rider style, I been getting hit on by dudes everywhere I go."

by keifermail August 23, 2008

Dookie Finger

A coup de grace where one drags their finger through their ass and wipes it under a rivals nose. Though, not used very often after adolescence, a dookie finger carries more weight than a slap in the face with a white glove.

Jacob wanted to give her a dirty sanchez before she dumped him but she wouldn't let him tap that ass, so he had to settle for a dookie finger.

by keifermail August 14, 2009