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JDMGio's definitions

awesomeing

The frivolous act of making ones' self seem more sophisticated, athletic, smarter or generally greater than those around them when in fact the individual is more than likely a giant floppy cock. The transition from being a well-rounded individual to a self-righteous fuck has not only plagued mankind, but perplexed us as well. With an insurmountable and seemingly endless bank of knowledge in all areas and facets of life, the "awesomer" will undoubtedly ear fuck the shit out of you with an array of whimsical allegories which he or she discovered while exploring the vast reaches of their own anus.
Awesomer -"I don't know if you are familiar with fasting, but it is really good for your body. That is why, unlike most people, I fast nearly once a month. It takes a lot of determination and will power, but as I mentioned previously I am not like most people."

Individual fed up with awesomer - "Dude, I couldn't be happier for you. On another note, I started awesomeing today. Yeah, its pretty great. I already gained 50 lbs. of muscles and my dick grew 3 inches. . . in both size and girth!"
by JDMGio April 23, 2010
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McRibmania

The erratic and fan frenzied behavior that ensues when McDonalds graciously brings back the McRib to the masses. Like a gift from God, this delectable delight brings both joy and utter chaos by its presence alone; turning man against his brethren.
Whilst gallivanting around with Laney, Jason saw something that both troubled and overwhelmed him with an unreserved, and seemingly familiar infatuation. Like a shining beacon of truth, the billboard’s words touched him like no poet could ever hope to - “The McRib is back!” The golden arches of glory, once a mere glimmer on the horizon, awoke something inside him he knew to be incorruptible - McRibmania. As if mandated from the heavens, he traversed four lanes of traffic (nearly striking several elderly pedestrians and one small child), keeping steadfast to that ghostly jewel that captivated and enamored his very essence.

What the HELL are you doing” screamed Laney, her high-pitched voiced piercing his ears like a verbal blade. Like a tidal wave of emotions, his mind was flooded with feelings of intense fury and remorse.

Jason knew he had faltered, that he made a mistake - a mistake that he needed to rectify forthwith. With one swift motion, as if rehearsed or committed to memory, Jason reached across the passenger seat, threw open the door and kicked the unwelcome transient to the curb. Left in tears and questions, Laney watched her former suitor squeal out of that familiar parking lot. With a sigh of relief and treasure in hand (and partially in mouth), he drove into that uncharted expanse - never questioning his judgment and never looking back.
by JDMGio November 2, 2010
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Pearl Jammed

When one is listening to a Pearl Jam song or is merely reminded of one of their songs, and is unable to get said song and/or Eddie Vedder's voice out of their head. This state can last anywhere from a few minutes to several weeks, depending on which Pearl Jam song it is.

Note: This is also applicable to any song from Temple of the Dog, especially Hunger Strike.
Ex. 1

Broface 1: "Dude, why do you keep humming Evenflow?"

Broseph 2: Playing air guitar in the middle of a crowed department store, "My bad bra, I heard it on the radio earlier today and ever since then I have been Pearl Jammed by it."

Ex. 2

Brobarian 1 : "Anna Nicole's mama said that I won't wanna see Anna fall down again. And the wizard . . ."

Brobot 2: Interrupts " Dude, are you singing the misheard lyrics of Yellow Ledbetter?"

Brobarian 1: “Yeah, it has been Pear Jammed in my head for like 3 1/2 years now. I've been seeking professional council for it."
by JDMGio February 10, 2010
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cumstellation

When a man ejaculates onto a female, creating an intricate web of semen that connects moles and/or freckles, which in turn resembles a grouping of celestial bodies (a constellation).
I blew my load on Shanon's chest last night and it kinda resembled the cumstellation Cassiopeia!
by JDMGio January 6, 2011
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Boner Bucks

The defacement of a U.S. dollar bill by adding a "B" to the beginning and a "r" to the end of the word "one" on the back of said bill. This is preferably done with a Sharpie so as to make the defacement that much more prevalent and noticeable.

Once a bill has been converted into a Boner Buck, it can and should only be used in transactions involving strippers and/or ladies of the street (prostitutes). Any other use of said bill is vehemently frowned upon.
Boys get your Boner Bucks ready, we are hitting up Mons Venus tonight! On a side note - you better bring an arsenal of Boner Bucks if you want a Rusty Tromblumpkin.
by JDMGio September 2, 2010
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Brewbarian

An uncivilized and savage individual whose idiosyncrasies are cultivated and sustained by the vast consumption of alcohol.
One must be wary when consorting with brewbarians, for they will unscrupulously pillage and plunder any women, provisions, riches and ale that come within their reach. By nature, they are devoid of logic and reason.
You should have seen Patrick this weekend; he went into total brewbarian mode. Not only did he drink his weight in delicious craft beer, but he successfully fought three ne'er-do-wells and wooed their lady folk accordingly.
by JDMGio October 7, 2010
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scamwich

The act of bribing someone with a tasty sandwich as payment for aiding in a strenuous/superfluous endeavor.

*Recipients should be wary, bribers may or may not renege on sandwich payment.*
Will: "Hey Mac, would you mind helping me load these 57 bags of concrete mix into my truck?"

Mac: "Are you serious!?! I've got other sh-"

Will:"There is a Publix Chicken Tender sub in it for you."

Mac: "Damn you and your scamwich tactics!. . . alright, I'll help."
by JDMGio October 27, 2010
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