Hansonpaulsey's definitions

MEGA

stands for "Makes Every Girl Aroused"; nickname of a contestant on the first season of Tool Academy on VH1

"You can call me Mega because I make every girl aroused."

by Hansonpaulsey October 11, 2009

Flesh Cave

Noun: An extremely loose-lipped vagina

"My dick was practically lost in her flesh cave."

by hansonpaulsey November 9, 2009

urbandictionaddict

Noun: A person who is literally addicted to either submitting new definitions or surfing through other's slang on www.urbandictionary.com

"Hansonpaulsey is definitely an urbandictionaddict. Too bad there's no urbandictionaddicts anonymous."

by hansonpaulsey November 9, 2009

Bowel Towel

Noun; After taking a shit and being unaware that you are out of toilet paper, your next best option is to use a towel conveniently hung near the toilet.

"After Michael dropped a deuce, his next best option was the bowel towel hanging next to the tub."

by hansonpaulsey December 27, 2009

Gripjob

When an overly-excited or inexperienced girl attempts to give you a handjob but then ends up choking your dick to the point that it almost isn't worth it anymore.

9th grader: "Dude did you get some friday night!?"
another 9th grader: "Yeah but the girl gave me a gripjob and now it hurts to piss."

by Hansonpaulsey October 11, 2009

Ass Trash

Noun; After taking a shit and being unaware that you are out of toilet paper, your next best option is to search in the trash can next to you for any wiping material;

usually results in using:
-paper towels used previously to clean your sink
-toilet paper used to previously clean the top of the toothpaste
-previously used stridex pads
-previously used tampons wrapped up in toilet paper
-previously used tissues used to blow your nose
-the cardboard cylinder of the recently run-out toilet paper

"After eating chipotle, Mike rushed to the bathroom in order to drop his deuce. Afterwards, he realized that he was completely out of toilet paper. He then remembered his next best option: ass trash. Mike had to refer to wiping his ass with his mother's previously used vaginal pad.

by hansonpaulsey October 25, 2009

n00dz?

Noun: A question( proposing someone to send nude pictures) that is usually asked to seem "un-serious" or "sarcastic" to see if the person will in fact send nude pictures.
If answered with a yes, the proposer will then ask to see them.
If answered with a no, the proposer will then act as if they weren't being literal and quickly change the subject to avoid embarrassment.

Text message conversation:
Guy: "Sup girl?"
Girl: "Not much, just uploading some pictures."
Guy: "n00dz? ;"
Girl: "What am I, 14? I don't do that."
Guy: "Haha I know, I was kidding... anyway, how are you?"

by Hansonpaulsey October 12, 2009